2) Awkward Session

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ALIYAH'S POV
I was busy adding lyrics to my new song when Billie plopped down on the couch beside me.

Yes, Billie and I still see each other almost everyday at the studio. But despite all those days, love has not been in the air for a long while now.

"Tre's out," Billie said. "And so is Mike."

I waited for a few seconds before answering, "so?"

"Would you please remind me what day it is today, Aliyah?" Billie said with a sly smile.

I rolled my eyes. "It's Friday," I mumbled.

"You know what that means," he said, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Yes, I do," I said in a sarcastic tone. "It means that I should finish this song by the end of the day."

Billie put his hands on my shoulder and started to give me a back rub. "You should chill for a while."

"You're right," I heaved then slumped on the couch. "Gosh, this feels so great."

"That, my dear Aliyah, is called 'rest'."
I chuckled.

BILLIE'S POV
I laid my eyes on her for a moment. Most times I wonder when exactly we stopped being...close (well, physically). It just happened, y'know? It's like an invisible barricade suddenly rose between us and that stopped me from reaching out. It's like months ago, I was able to convince her to 'keep-in-touch' with me (even if she told me to not have any more sexy stuff) but now...we're strangers again. We slowly started to drift away from each other these past few months.

Aliyah rolled her eyes at me. "You waiting for that make-out sesh, huh?"

"Not really," I admitted. "I was just wondering how we got here."

She gave me a funny look. "We got in your car, Billie."

That made me laugh a little. "You know what I'm talking about."

"Yeah." Her eyes slowly found it's way down on the floor. "It feels different, now."

"How could you say that? We haven't even touched each other yet."

"I don't know...it feels new."

"New?" I asked. "Do you want to at least give it a try?"
I tucked a chunk of hair behind her ear. "For old time's sake."

"Okay," Aliyah whispered.

We both leaned in slowly for the kiss. I've kissed Aliyah for like a thousand times before, but she was right. This does feel new. Soon, I felt our lips touch. It was okay. I lingered on her lips for a while before pulling away. I don't want to overwhelm her by sticking my tongue down her throat right away.

Aliyah remained silent for a couple of seconds after the kiss. She was staring out in the open, her mind flying to gawd-knows-where.
"So?" I asked.

She nodded. "It was okay." Aliyah played with the hem of her shirt. "Wanna go again?"

I couldn't help but smile. "Thought you'd never ask."

I gently pressed my lips on hers again. The kiss was going great so far when...
We suddenly had different paces. I could feel Aliyah's frustration before slightly pushing me away.

She cleared her throat. "That was..."

"We sucked," I said.

She took in some air. "Again," she told me, eyes filled with determination.

I nodded then leaned in again.
But...

I accidentally hit her teeth.

"Ow!" She exclaimed. I was so embarrassed I barely felt the pain on my own teeth. 

"Oh gosh, I am so sorry."

Aliyah laughed half-heartedly. "It's fine. I'll be fine. Shall we go again?"

"Okay," I said nervously.
Seriously, what is wrong with us?!

We leaned in, our foreheads touching, lips about an inch apart.
Nothing could go wrong now, right? Cause I swear the air is smothering me in my own mortification.

"Okay...go." She breathed.

And then our heads tilted to the same direction.
Fuck!

"What the hell is wrong with us?!" Aliyah threw her hands in the air of frustration.
I clamped my mouth shut, deciding to let her speak.

She let out a heavy sigh. "I told you it's different now. I'm pretty sure you already know what mean."

I met her eyes. She was right. It feels different. It's not that it's wrong, but it wasn't right either. Honestly, I wanted us to work out despite having to hide our relationship from everyone. I know that someday, she'll tell me to stay the fuck away and really mean it this time. She tried talking me into accepting that we can't be together before but...I was stubborn.
Plus, she couldn't resist me.

I mean, her kissing me a while ago is a sign that somewhere, deep in her heart, she also wanted be with me.

But what if she does tells me to fuck off and move on? Like right now, at this moment?
I know I wouldn't be able to handle it.
So I did the stupidest thing ever.
-
-
-
I gave up first.

"You're right, Aliyah." I choked out. "I think it's really time to...y'know, let go, move on, and accept that we can't be together. I'm sorry I was very headstrong about it before."

Her eyes widened. She definitely wasn't expecting me to say those words.
She didn't argue with me though. A faint 'yeah' was all I heard from her.

Okay so maybe I messed up. Maybe she wasn't going to tell me that. But either way, I want to be the one who breaks it off.

ALIYAH'S POV
I couldn't believe that Billie just said that. Yesterday, he was the guy who actually set dates for me to make out and have sex with him but now...he's giving it all up?? Well, there wasn't anything wrong about that. Our relationship isn't really...acceptable. But even though we're both aware that it's not, we stayed strong. To be honest, my relationship with Billie is extremely exciting. I actually enjoy all the hiding and breaking rules. We're partners in crime.
How could he say that? Am I really talking to Billie Joe Armstrong right now??

Yeah, accepting the we can't be together is what I've been blabbering about for over a year now but my heart couldn't help but crack. It seems as though a small piece of it was chipped off...

...okay, maybe a big piece.

Was I feeding his mind of this stuff too much? Maybe.
I was only playing hard to get! He's giving up after all the times he tried to continue being with me?
I guess I pushed him way too far.

Miraculously, I was saved by the Tre. He came bursting through the studio door with a smile on his face.
"Guys! I got to customize my new set!"

Thank goodness he saved me from the awkward/heart-breaking situation.

My face lit up as if on cue. "Wow! That's great! When can we see it?"

"The guys are unloading it right now come on!"

I jumped off my seat and bolted out the room, rushing (and by that I mean getting away from Billie as far as possible) to see Tre's new drum set.

He's The One [Billie Joe Armstrong Fanfic] (Book 2 of Not The One)Where stories live. Discover now