playboy bunny - n.s

2.6 + niall

Niall

"Hey baby." My body goes rigid as his hands grip my waist and pull me towards him, the strong smell of alcohol hits my nose and I close my eyes, breathing slowly and deeply.

Submit. Obey. Shut up. Take everything he gives you. Don't resist.

It was a series of words that I chanted in my head so that I'll get this over with quickly, I do my best to feel nothing and be numb so I could get it over with quickly and I could go up to my son and sleep beside him, keep him safe.

"I have my friends over." He mumbles, turning me around, I take in the sight of him, his smile makes me sick, his touch makes me sick, everything about him makes me want to puke.

"Again?" I tried to smile a bit but it probably came out as a grimace. I could take him when we were alone because it's just me and him but I hate it when his friends are over, it was the worst, nothing good comes out from it ever.

"Yeah they like to see you dance baby. My beautiful... Beautiful baby." He whispers, leaning in and I couldn't help but turn my head to the side so he'd miss my lips and I gently push him away but he doesn't take the hint and continue to kiss my neck.

I wanted to cry, I wanted to run, I wanted to go away, escape this place, this nightmare, this fucking hell hole that I used to call home.

It's funny how something that's supposed to make you feel safe and secure will turn out to be your own personal hell.

"My body hurts today- can we not-"

"What are you good at hmm baby?" He asks his index finger and thumb tipping my chin back and I gulp as I stare deep into his eyes that were now filled with annoyance.

Submit. Obey. Shut up. Take everything that he gives you. Don't resist.

I repeated in my head and shut out everything, instead of resisting, I let my arms hang limp on my side, not trying to push him away anymore but finally letting him do whatever he wants to do to me.

"Spreading my legs and making you feel good." I mumbled, a thousand of scenarios in my head as to where this will go, to what will happen next.

"You're gonna be good for me then?"

"Yes." I nod.

"Of course you are. Now do what you do best we'll be waiting princess." He kisses my lips this time and I just let him, I can't do anything. I'm scared. I'm too weak and I love my son too much.

He lets me go after that and I do what I have to do, I go upstairs to check on Jacob who's sleeping peacefully on the bed with his favorite teddy bear that he hugged tightly, the sight made my heart clench with love and joy, I brushed his fringe to the side, kissing his forehead and that's when I notice it.

My tears are running down my face. I never wanted this life. I never thought it would turn out like this. I wanted to go to America, study sound engineering, produce some music, change the whole world with it, make a fucking difference but no I had to be stuck in this.

I had to suffer but then I look at Jacob and know that I'm doing all of this for him and it's all worth it.

Maybe they'll go easy on me tonight. Maybe nothing will happen.

I pull up his blankets before getting up and leaving the room to grab my clothes that I needed to change into.

"Niall you better be ready when I come up!" Comes a booming voice from downstairs and I panic slightly, grabbing my black laces without hesitation and taking my clothes off and putting my favorite underwear on.