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Chapter 45 - Harry

                                                                 45.  

                                                           ●•Harry•●

She hadn’t called and it wasn’t a surprise at all. Though I must admit I was highly disappointed. She sounded so serious when she asked for my phone I actually thought we were going to go somewhere this time. The idea of going out on an actual date with her was tempting, but I couldn’t forget the fact that she hadn’t exactly said ‘yes’ to me. Well, she didn’t say ‘no’ either, but still, I guess that’s what she meant.

I don’t know, she’s confusing. A while ago I’m sure she’d have totally said ‘no’ without a second thought on it, but now she tells me she’s going to call, when obviously, she won’t. Is this a progress or is she just trying another way to get me to give up? Because, honestly, it’s getting me confused. She said she won’t try to push me away, she smiled at me, she looked at me as if she’d really missed me, and then she disappeared for a while again. I’m not sure what’s this supposed to mean.

Sure, I could’ve called her – I have her number now, after all – but I don’t want to be the one to give the first step again. I don’t want to bother her ‘cause I’m still insisting on that ‘giving her some space’ thing, plus, she asked me not to. She said she might change her mind. But then again: why did she even give me her number instead of just asking me for mine? Why did she have to save her name on my contacts? Does she want me to call? Maybe I should wait a bit more before I do that.

“You’re surely insane,” Leroy said, making me look at him and stop thinking of his sister. Was this inappropriate? I mean, thinking of his gorgeous sister next to me, smiling at me, kissing me, or just rolling her eyes at me whilst he was there, right in front of me? I dunno, he doesn’t really look like the kind of brother that would get jealous of Kirsten.

I laughed at his words, sipping my coffee before shrugging at him.

“I guess you can say that,” I added, not being able to remove the grin from my lips.

Leroy and I had agreed to go out to some café just to go and grab something together, chat a bit and get to get used to each other a bit more, I guess. We’ve been talking a lot about Kirsten, but now there’s not really much he can tell me. She doesn’t show much of her life to him, so he doesn’t know much more than what I do. To be honest, now I’m the one who talks the most.

Lee has been really supportive of me. So much it almost feels like he wants us to be together as much as I do. Almost.

At the beginning he wasn’t fond of the idea, but it wasn’t because of his sister. He seemed truly concerned about me, how much I was going to be disappointed once I realized there was no chance, how much she’d ruin me and stuff like that, though after a few talks he understood that no matter what he said, he wouldn’t change my mind. Now I can see cheer hope in his eyes and I know he believes there’s a small percentage that I might change his sister’s life. Especially after I told him about the last time we saw each other. And all the other ones, as well…

Of course, I kept the best details to myself. Those memories I want to feel, only. No one else needs to know about what she does to me. No one else besides her.

“But, seriously, what do you see in her?” he asked, mimicking my movements and sipping his own coffee while raising an eyebrow.

I did the same, looking at him with the corner of my eyes, my fingers still scrolling the screen of my phone in an attempt of finding any possible missed calls, which didn’t happen, to my disappointment. Then I shrugged, looking for my donut instead of staring at Leroy’s eyes. The reason? I knew I’d sound stupid saying the following words; I didn’t need to watch his reaction.