Prologue

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Prologue

"Niall, I'm scared." I whisper, holding onto him for dear life.
"There's no need to be frightened, baby. I'll take care of you." He soothes me, refusing to let go.
"He'll get in here. He's going to get us."
"Evie, he won't get in here. I won't let him." He assures me.
Niall's grip suddenly loosens and he stands up, making his way to the other side of the bedroom.
"Niall, what are you doing? Don't go!" I beg him, scrambling after him.
"Look, I don't know how long the lock on that door is going to hold out for. I want you to hide in the closet where you can be safe."
"Come with me!" I plead, terrified by the idea of leaving him. "I can't hide in there alone."
"Evie, you have to. I want you to be safe."
"B-but what are you going to do?" I stammer, trying to fight against my fear.
"I'm going to let him beat me." Niall replies, sounding determined and incredibly brave. "I hope that will be enough and he'll leave you alone tonight."
"No!" I cry, clinging onto him once more.
"It's the only way." He murmurs, stroking my hair back from my face. "He's so mad and drunk, he won't stop until he's unleashed all that anger on one of us."
"Please." I beg him, hoping it will change his mind.
"Evie, take this." He says, forcing me to take something. "It's the key to the closet. I don't want you to unlock that door to anyone but me. No matter what you hear."
"Why are you doing this?" I ask him, struggling to understand. "Why do you always protect me?"
"Because you're mine. I have to keep you safe."
He strokes my hair one final time and helps me into the large closet. He smiles weakly, closing the door behind him.
The darkness is terrifying and I hug my knees to my chest, rocking back and forth while I cry softly.
I don't want to know what's going on inside but I can't help but listen. I can hear Niall yelling and so is Jeremy, both of them screaming at one another while I tremble uncontrollably.
Niall is just seven years old and yet he's willing to take on a man in his early forties. I'm in absolute awe of him and long for him to be ok so I can tell him that he's my hero.

A thunderous noise soon follows and an earth-shattering roar can be heard from Niall. I scramble against the closet door, forgetting that I locked it and have to use the key to get out.
"Niall!" I scream, clawing and kicking at the locked door in front of me. "Niall!"

Silence.

My God what if he's... what if that monster has killed my best friend? The one and only person in this world to take care of me.

What if he's gone forever?
My six year old self crumbles to the floor, rocking back and forth as I choke on my own tears.

He's dead.

Niall is gone and I'm all alone.

I'll stay here ... I think to myself. If Niall is dead then I don't want to leave this closet.

Ever.

I don't know how long I hide in there, snuffling and crying by myself. It feels like years but it might have only been minutes.
A soft scratching outside suddenly reminds there's still a world beyond this small space I'm trapped in and I freeze.
I'm too scared to breathe, silently terrified as I wait. I can hear my heart beating inside my chest, pounding in my ears.
"Evie, it's me." A weak voice croaks, knocking gently.
I instantly recognise his voice and fumble around in the darkness for the key I misplaced.
"Niall, are you ok? I can't find the key!"
"Unlock the door." He urges me, struggling to speak. "Quickly."
My small hand lands on the cold metal object and I pray to God I can somehow find the keyhole in the darkness. I finally succeed after several attempts and fling the door open.
"Oh, my God..." I gasp, covering my mouth with my hand. "What did he do to you?"
I've never seen anything like it in my life. I can hardly recognise my best friend and can't imagine how much pain he must be in. His face is black and blue and his right eye is swollen, he can hardly open it and his bottom lip is burst.
"It doesn't matter." He assures me. "Are you ok?"
"No, I'm not ok!" I cry, traumatised by what's just happened. "I thought he killed you!"
"I'd like to see him try." Niall jokes, struggling to make light of something so tragic.
"But he hurt you. He hurt you real bad, Niall."
"It looks worse than it is."
I know he's lying and only trying to make me feel better. I long to help him and make his pain go away, just like he always makes mine disappear.
"What can I do?" I ask him. "How can I help you? Should I phone an ambulance?"
"No. No ambulance." He insists, trying to sit up a little straighter. "If you phone them then social services will split us up."
"What are you talking about?"
"Social services will find out he's beating us. They'll come in and tear us apart, sending us to different homes and we won't see each other again."
"Niall, this is serious. You need a hospital."
"You can be my nurse." He tells me, squeezing my hand. "You can take care of me."
"But I don't know what to do!"
"He's not home." He informs me. "He's gone out so the coast is clear. Go into the bathroom and run a cloth under some warm water, that's all I need."
"Wait right here." I foolishly instruct him.
"It's not like I'm going anywhere." He chuckles, wincing from the pain of his split lip when he smiles.
I race into the bathroom and grab my pink flannel, unable to remember which one belongs to Niall. I'm sure he won't mind me using my own to make him feel better and wait until the water turns hot.
It almost burns my fingers but I don't want it to be too cold, trying to make sure that I don't fail him now.
I hurry back into the bedroom and lock the door behind me, terrified that Jeremy might come back any second.
"Thanks, Evie." Niall whispers, trying to take the flannel from me.
"Let me." I mumble, hoping he will allow it.
"You sure?"
I dab his lip first, apologising when he winces in pain once more.
"I'm so sorry this happened to you." I apologise, knowing he was only trying to protect me.
"It's not your fault." He reminds me. "The only one to blame is him."
"But why does he do it? Why does he enjoy hurting people?"
"Because he's a monster." Niall answers simply.
"That can't be true. Monsters only exist in fairy tales."
"Not always, Evie."
"How do you mean?"
"Sometimes... sometimes people can be monsters too. They do bad things. They hurt people and enjoy it."
"You mean people like Jeremy?" I ask, wondering who else out there could be like him.
"Not just him." He tells me, closing his eyes.
"Then who?"
"People like me."
"You're not a monster." I blurt out, struggling to understand how he could say such a thing.
"I am." He says, keeping his eyes closed. "I mean... I was."
"How do you mean?"
"Before I came here... I used to like hurting people. Or I liked the thought of hurting people."
"You mean people like Jeremy?"
"No, not just people like him." He admits.
"So... people like me?"
"No!" He exclaims loudly. Opening his eyes so he can look at me. "Not you. I could never hurt you, Evie."
"You're a good person, Niall. I know you are."
"That's just it, I'm not. I never have been."
"All you've ever been is nice to me. You protect me all the time. Don't ever tell me you're a bad person."
"That's just it. You're the one who makes me want to be good. You're the only reason I try so hard and the only person in this world I don't want to hurt."
"I... I don't understand." I confess, trying to find a way I can comprehend what he's saying.
"Neither do I. Look, all I can say is you make me better. You're my medicine and if I don't have you I'm afraid I'll get sick again."
"You'll always have me, Niall. I'm not going anywhere."
"You promise?" He asks, sounding doubtful and a little scared.
"I promise."
There's a moment of silence between us before Niall breaks it, holding onto me so he can stand up.
"We best get ready for bed."
"You know you're not allowed to sleep in my room." I remind him, hating the stupid rules we have to obey.
"Evie, I've been sneaking into your room for the past six months. It's not like they even care."
"Jeremy does."
"Screw Jeremy. I'm not leaving you alone." He insists.
"I'm sorry about the pink flannel." I apologise. "I couldn't find yours."
"It's ok." He says, ruffling my hair. "I don't mind the colour so long as it's yours."
"We should probably get some sleep now. It's pretty late."
"I think I'll stay awake tonight. I want to make sure he doesn't want trouble again when he comes home."
"Niall, you're injured. Let me be the one who stays awake." I plead with him, wanting to help any way I can.
"Not a chance. Now come on, let's get into bed."
He climbs in beside me, lying on his back so he doesn't hurt his bruised face. I curl up beside him, resting my head on his chest.
"I hate this place but I'm glad I came here." I tell him, remembering the first day I arrived.
"How come?"
"Because I met you." I whisper. "You're my hero."
"I wish I was."
"You already are."
"One day I'll make sure I get you out of here. We'll escape and start a new life someplace else."
"You promise?"
"I promise."
He sounds so certain, I don't doubt him for a second. Niall made a vow that we would run away when we're old enough, planning our escape from the moment we became friends.
"And until then we hold on?"
"We hold onto one another and make sure that no one comes between us." He tells me, holding me even tighter.
"They won't" Niall. That's impossible."
"Too right it is."
"Goodnight." I yawn, settling down to sleep.
"Sweet dreams, Evie."
His eyes remain open, forever keeping watch and making sure I'm safe.

Niall was my best friend.

He was me hero.

The one person I clung onto in the dark.

He was the monster I fell in love with.

He told me he was a bad person but I didn't believe him.

I didn't want to believe he was capable of hurting people.

I really should have listened.


 

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