Our Song

Our Song (19)

"You can't avoid me forever."

"I can try."

"Avoiding is supposed to be my job," I informed Sean flatly, grabbing onto his shoulder and forcing him to look at me. "But now I'm the one doing the chasing. It's some serious hard work; I don't know why you do it so much."

"I already told you why I'd always follow you around," Sean informed me, not even looking in my direction and looking like he'd love to slam his locker shut and just storm off. "But what did I get when I confessed to you? Absolutely nothing. Oh, I did get a confession for Blake Solo though."

"Sean," I groaned, not knowing how I was supposed to make everything better. "Please don't act this way. I'm sorry that I don't feel that way about you and I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings--"

"You didn't just hurt my feelings, Leah," Sean snapped, slamming his locker shut and turning toward me now. "You crushed me. You've always blown me off like my feelings aren't important to you. I've been in love with you from the moment I saw you and you just go and fall for some guy that you've only known for a couple of months!"

"I'm sorry," I nearly squeaked, feeling the tears coming on. "What else am I supposed to say? I feel horrible for what I've done and I shouldn't have slapped you. But you attacked him! You attacked Blake! I'm sorry, but I can't forgive you for that!"

"And I can't forgive you," Sean nearly growled, stepping so close to me that our noses were almost touching now. "I can't forgive you for leading me on for six years like it was no big deal at all. I can't forgive you for falling in love with a freak. But you know what? You know what I really can't forgive? I can't forgive myself for falling in love with you."

I wiped at my eyes with the back of my hand. "Sean."

"Just... enough, Leah," Sean sighed, shaking his head and finally looking away from me. "I don't want to hear anything else from you. Odds are I'm not going to like it anyway."

He turned away then and stalked off down the hall, leaving me all alone in the empty hallway. I was glad that it was after school and nearly everyone had already gone home, because I didn't want anyone to see that. Hell, I didn't even want to see that.

I sniffed, trying my best to hold back my tears and failing. I wiped at my eyes as they fell, wanting nothing more than a completely platonic relationship from Sean. He would have been a great friend of mine.

"Hey," a new voice now said from behind me, nearly causing me to jump right across the hall. I knew that voice too well, and I wished he wouldn't have seen me right then. I didn't want him to see me crying.

"Hey," I hiccupped, trying to play it off even though there was no way in hell I was going to do so.

Blake's eyes widened as I continued to wipe at mine. "Leah? Why are you crying?"

"I just... I..."

But I couldn't form the words. Remembering it made me choke up even more, so there was no way I could say anything to him yet. I took a few steps forward, wrapping my arms around his waist and pressing my face into his chest. His hand traveled to the back of my head, soothing my hair while I sobbed.

"Leah, what's wrong?" he asked me softly when my crying had died down just a little. "Why are you crying? Tell me."

"I just... feel horrible about what happened with Sean," I admitted, pulling away and facing him so he could read my lips. He may have been taking medication now, but it was way too early for him to stop using the headphones. "I was talking to him and he was saying things that just made me feel so guilty and I... I..."