Chapter 4: I refuse to let fate win.

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I have never been this angry. Oh my god, I'm so pissed. I could cry.

Fucking Carter went to a party on Friday and had sex. I get he's not mine, and I may not care about him at all, but we're supposed to fall in love. Excuse me for wanting to be his first.

And he had the nerve to tell me in the middle of the hallway. He had the nerve to whisper it in my ear. Lucy won't speak to me.

"Are you angry?" he asks.

I slam my locker so hard that the mirror on the door of the locker next to me falls to the floor and shatters. He flinches.

"We're not together anyways, so it doesn't matter."

People are watching. Lucy looks concerned. My face is mixed in so much emotion. Hurt is there. He probably can't see it, but I know Lucy can.

"It doesn't matter?" I repeat, raising my eyebrows. "Fuck you!" I turn around and walk off, trying not to cry.

If we're supposed to be in love, why would go have sex with some other girl? Wouldn't he want to save himself? Right? Right? That's the only reason I've never had sex! I knew that there was someone that was supposedly Mr. Right, and I get him? I fucking hate you, fate. I hate you so much. Fuck you.

"You hate me anyways! Why does it fucking matter?"

Lucy opens her mouth to say something, but I whip around. People are dead silent, watching.

"Don't ever talk to me. Ever. I never want to see you. I never want to hear your voice. I fucking hate you. I hate you, but I hate fate even more for getting me stuck with you."

There are a few teachers in the hallways, and the principal, and the assistant principal.

It's Monday. I overslept. It's raining.

I fucking hate Mondays.

"Roxy." He says. "I'm sorry!"

I ignore him and just keep walking.

"Roxy!" he calls again, following me.

He grabs my hand, and I get so fucking mad when I feel the heat and the tingles.

It doesn't fit with him.

I never cry. Ever. I can't even remember the last time I cried. It's been years.

I rip my hand from his grasp, and I feel tears sliding down my cheeks. "Just leave me alone." I whisper, defeated.

He looks like he's in physical pain. "I'm sorry."

"If you're sorry, you'll never speak to me. Ever."

I leave the building, and he doesn't follow me.

I'm not going home. I run, ditching my bag in my motorcycles seat.

It's pouring, but I can't go home.

I've explored our town. It's an island off the coast of California and there is a bridge connecting it to the actual Untied States. It's a mountain, and we live on the west side of it, facing the ocean, not the city. We live on the side of the mountain and it goes down into the ocean. About halfway up the mountain, the town stops and it turns into forest. I have a secret spot in the mountain and I'm almost sure nobody has ever seen it. Not even Lucy knows about it.

I run, ditching the school grounds. There isn't any cell service where I am going. My phone is in my pcket in the lifeproof case. I go bolting down the cobblestone streets, the rain hiding my tears. I run and run until I exit the town and enter the forest. I bolt through the trees, following the familiar ways I have learnt to recognize. I run until I reach the top, and then I run down, to the side facing the city.

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