//tododeku angst\\

chapter 6

POV Shoto

"What...?" I say shocked

"I'm...I'm sorry, I-I bet you're tired of hearing this" he stands up of my bed and goes to the door to go out of my dorm...

"No Midoriya, wait." I say firmly, standing up from the bed to.

He stopped moving but keep his hand in the door handle.

I go to where he is and take his hand to stop him from leaving.

I pass my hand over his arm and then to the back of his neck.
I can see he's holding back tears so I pull him into a hug.
He lets it all out snuggling into my neck...

I start to rub circles in his back and whispering sweet nothings in his ear to calm him down..

He's sobbing so hard... What's is happening in that little mind of yours midoriya...

"I'm sorry todoroki... I'm so so sorry...!" He says holding into me for dear life...

"No Midoriya... You have nothing to be sorry for..." I replied
"Calm down mido... I'm not going to force you to say something you're not ready to say..." I continued...

"Thank you Todoroki... I love you so much... Thank you for everything.. I definitely not deserve you at all..." He says crying "I love you a lot.."

"You deserve the whole world izuku midoriya... I love you more than you think..."

(Time skip)

POV. Izuku

We were watching movies, cuddling in his bed when suddenly he closed the laptop..

I looked up to him in confucion

"I need to talk to you izuku"

I immediately tensed up... What...? Please don't force me, I'm not ready to say to much...

"Don't worry izu... Everything is going to be okay but I really need to help you and I need you to answer me truthfully" he said and I nodded

Sure, I  was scared but I know he's not going to give up...

"How long have you been with this thoughts..?" He asked me

Ok... That's not that hard to answer...

"I'm not sure... I think since highschool?"

He raised an eyebrow

"I don't know... Maybe a little earlier..." I said truthfully

I can see how he's hiding his sadness and shock..

I sit on his lap and hug him... He hugs back sighing...
Without changing positions he continues...
"Why... Why do you cut yourself?" He asks quietly

I tensed up but he squeeze me tighter

"Please... Tell me" he whispers in my ear...

I calmed down a bit... What other choice do I have...?

"You won't tell anyone right...?" I ask worried

"Of course not... It's your decision if you want to tell anyone else..."

"Ok... Thank you" I say and he just nods

I sigh and start telling him all the truth

"When I was little a friend of mine always bullied me... Saying that I was weak, pathetic and things like that... Then I got into highschool and all the students on my class bullied me because I was bisexual... Well... They said I was gay but I'm not... I'm bisexual...! Th-there's a di-diference..." I could feel my eyes watering because of the memories...
Shoto held me close and started to rub my back

"I know love... They were just assholes..." He says...
I nod in his shoulder and continue...

"Before all of that my father left and never came back... Of course they had to bring up the subject and said it was my fault... I a-actually believe them... I heard my parents talk about me and my weakness every single night... But I always tried to forget about that.. but.. when the people around you remind you of that subject every day it gets kinda hard..." I stopped talking to take a break of all the memories that were coming back to my head...

"Do you think you're ready to tell me the next part...?" Shoto asks me

I slowly nod "yeah... I trust you..."

"I know, but are you sure...?" He asks me

He's so sweet, why do he cares so much for  me?

I slowly nod, and break the hug.

He puts his hands in my waist keeping me close... I looked down to continue... I didn't wanted to look at his face...

"Then... I started cutting myself... It got worse and worse... Sure, it hurt, but I just needed a distraction... I did it because I felt I deserved to feel pain... I didn't had another option..." I paused and sigh "Some weeks after... A classmate found out I was doing self-harm... He said it to the whole school so they laughed at me because of that... No matter what I did or say, anything stoped them..."

Shoto hugged me again and I hug back holding back my tears

"Then I got in UA and I met you... We started to get along and I fell in love with you... I continued to cut myself because I was hiding a lot of pressure and I just let it out in the pain of the cuts... I put a mask on, and smile, thinking that some day it would stop being a mask and my happiness would become real... But it didn't... It got worse and worse... Until I couldn't stand it anymore... And decided to kill myself..." We both started to cry hard, hugging each other...

"O My God..." Shoto just kept holding me... God I don't deserve him

(Tiny time skip)

After some time we both stopped crying...

We were still hugging. He was playing with my hair...

"Izu... I'm so sorry..." He whispers

"You have nothing to be sorry for Todo... This isn't your fault..." I replied

He breaks the hug and put a hand on my cheek...
He brings my head closer and kissed me... I obviously kissed back...
I love to kiss him... His lips are so soft and I wanna stay there, kissing him forever...

When we pull back he put his forehead in mine. We both close our eyes

"I have one more question..." He whispers without changing the position

I nod ready to answer the question... I'm still a bit scared but I know shoto won't force to do anything...

"How do you feel right now?"
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Wow, I did 1059 words!

Sooo, I cried writing this chapter, and maybe you're saying "it wasn't that bad, bla bla bla" I know alright!
It's just- I put some feelings in here and it made me cry, get over it.
I don't want your pity, my problems are just dumb, it doesn't matter 😅

Chile, anyways so- Hope you like this chapter! I'm sorry this is so long I just couldn't find a way to end it sooner, so yeah...

If you like it, please leave a vote! And I wanted to thank you all for the reads and everything! Thank you so much!

So that's it! Thank you for reading!

Byeeeeee~