35: the coach journey

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The night at Julians went very smooth, although I had to silence my phone for the whole evening due to the fact that Judd would keep messaging me atrocities and would carry on calling me non stop. I covered up the fact that I was extremely sad by distracting myself constantly, I think Julian noticed me crying into Judd's hoodie before going to sleep but he didn't say anything. Occasionally Julian would prompt me to respond to Judd's persistent attempts to contact me but I'd ignore him and carry on playing the video games that we were playing. 

We were currently on the bus making our way to school, where our coach would be waiting to take us to this science trip. I was scrolling through my amazon wishlist gazing at all the things I really wanted but knew that I'd probably never have the money to purchase. 

I missed Jessi, I would always wonder what she was up to, how school was going for her etc. I really honestly missed the endless laughs we'd have together and knew that eventually I was going to have to return home. I decided I would return home as soon as this dumb school trip was over, giving my dad enough time to return to my hometown. 

 "You know you're going to have to eventually talk to him...because we're going to be sharing a dorm with him." Julian said, interrupting my thoughtful but sleepy trance I was in by tapping me on the shoulder. I turned to face him and batted my eyes before letting a small 'tsk' noise escape my mouth and turning around to look at the scenery passing by. He sent me a sassy look before shoving me lightly, I let out a chuckle and shrugged. 
"I guess, but not right now." 
"How long are you going to keep saying that and avoiding the subject." The fact that he kept talking about it was winding me up. 
"Until I'm ready Julian!" I snapped back angrily without meaning to. 
"Okayyy, I'm just trying to help you out, but until you help yourself out there's nothing I can do." He said with a slightly pissed off tone, I apologised to him and grabbed his hand, squeezing it lightly to show that I really meant it. We spent the rest of the bus journey in silence. 

I grabbed my suitcase when we eventually arrived and walked to the coach, proceeding to load it in and make my way back to Julian, just to see him talking to another girl who was squealing excitedly about how much she had been looking foreword to this trip. He looked over at me briefly and indicated that he would catch up with me in a moment and I chuckled, nodding my head. I hopped on the coach, taking my seat near the back. I placed my backpack by my feet and observed everyone else forming a queue to get on after me, I had been lucky because I had been one of the first people to get on. 

To distract myself briefly, I plugged in my headphones and began playing some music. Almost immediately after someone took their place next to me and I sighed, looking to the side- expecting to see Julian ready to bother me with the latest gossip that he'd probably heard from the girl that he was talking to. Instead I saw a very pissed off Judd Birch, who was looking down at his phone, as if he were expecting a text or phone call from someone. My heart started beating faster than I wanted to and I flickered my gaze away from him nervously. 

I clenched my jaw and decided to stay quiet and keep my gaze focused on the window, despite the fact that I could see him in the reflection staring directly at me- I came to the conclusion that it was probably going to be like this the whole trip unless Julian came to save me. I nibbled on my lip and let out a deep breath before turning my attention back to my phone flicking through my playlist hoping to find a song that fit my mood. Angrily Judd let out a grunt- as if it were a way to get my attention, I shuffled uncomfortably and continued to ignore him. 

The coach began to move and I watched the trees and houses blur together as it picked up speed, trying to distract myself from the boy that was sitting next to me. My phone buzzed in my hand and I looked down to see a text message from Julian. 

JULIO- Talk to him. He's trying, you should try too. 

I sighed and closed my eyes before switching off my phone and shoving it back in my pocket, but just as I tried to nap again it buzzed a second time. I let out a throaty grunt and looked at it again. 

1 new message from JUDD

I had turned his name back to what it originally was because I didn't feel too comfortable with the name he had set, I could feel his gaze on my as I unlocked my phone to visualise the message. When I read it my eyes widened, it was different from all of his other vile messages (he had threatened me basically non stop throwing all kind of insults my way) but this one made my heart crack a little. 

Judd- Can you just please tell me what I did wrong. 

It came of as his last attempt to get through to me, I thought about my reply for a moment and then began typing. It was going to be short and to the point. I was thinking about just saying "No <3" but then decided not to because it would be too petty and childish- considering he was being civil now, there was no reason to throw wood into a burning fire. After pressing send on the message I had formulated I turned my notifications off and relaxed into my chair, closing my eyes and drifting off into a peaceful sleep. 

(Y/n)- Stop bothering me, you're acting like we were dating, who said we were dating? 


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