TWO : NO GOING BACK

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A couple of months later, when I was having tea with my grandmother and father at Buckingham palace one afternoon, in the midst of all the various topics we discussed - from Catherine's pregnancy & sickness to Christmas at Sandringham and the following year's events - my grandmother suddenly cleared her throat & sat up right, preparing herself to bring up the subject she gathered us for.. "Harry visited me a couple of days ago, and he proceeded to ask me for permission to marry his girlfriend, Meghan Markle. In all honesty, I was surprised but I didn't know how to decline his request !"

All of a sudden my father jumped out of his chair and said : "seriously mummy ?!". My grandmother was then quick to remind him of how tragic his marriage to my mother turned out to be when she rejected his permission to marry Camilla, "after three of my children divorced the spouses I thought were suitable for them, I swore I'd never have a say in whom my family members marry ever again, that's what I did with your first son and thank goodness Catherine turned out to be incredible, I sometimes even feel like she's holding the family together.. but I cannot deny that I felt hesitant at first because it was going to be the first marriage in the family of that sort" - she continued.

By this point I had had time to gather my thoughts & I replied to my grandmother's last statement : "but granny, Catherine and I dated for almost 10 years, we broke up and got back together which assured me that she was the one. She also had time to experience our life and how the media and the paparazzi affect it & she had time to adjust to the rules and protocol, Meghan didn't have any of that because my stupid brother is in a rush ! They're still in their honeymoon phase and they have no idea about how their life, their relationship and their whole situation would be once that lovely time ends !"

The queen then surprisingly nodded in agreement, "but don't you know how stubborn your brother can be, William ? He would have gone crazy if I told him something like this" - after she said that, I found myself mimicking her body language, just nodding in agreement.

••

A few days later he proposed to Meghan at home, and soon the engagement was announced to the public, followed by a photocall and an interview similar to the one Catherine and I gave after we announced ours. By that point the comparisons between us two couples had already begun, but it did not bother me back then, it wasn't anything serious.

What was infuriating for me though was the elite treatment she got, which neither my mother nor my wife had when they were engaged to my father and I.

After Harry begged like a baby to let Meghan spend Christmas with the family as his fiancée, my grandmother gave in "because she isn't British and she doesn't know the family very well, so we have to be extremely welcoming" - that's what I'd heard that she'd said. I was angry because Catherine and I were never allowed to spend that time together until we got married, one of the big fallouts we once had which eventually led to our breakup in 2007, was because we were never able to spend Christmas together like all those other couples do.

But.. I guess that was okay in comparison to how the family allowed her protection and security before she was tied to us in any official way, my mother died because she wasn't protected from the paparazzi and my wife struggled for years because she was stalked, spat on, disrespected and literally harassed by them. I wouldn't be that annoyed if she was grateful for all that was done for her, because I'm not a bad person, I wouldn't envy someone who has got the things I wished to have.. but I would envy someone who isn't appreciative of privileges that would have made my life & the life of many others, so much easier !

••

Christmas Eve and Day were approaching & I couldn't have been more excited to spend some private time with my family in our Sandringham home, but all my excitement was gone when Catherine told me that she'd invited Harry and Meghan to stay with us during that time. Don't get me wrong, I love how my wife is always there for everyone and her gesture only proved to me how sweet and kind she is, but.. we haven't had the best experience with Meghan so far and the fact that she still wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt and that she was willing to give her a chance didn't sit well with me. However.. after much convincing from her, I let go of my harsh feelings towards my brother's fiancée and I was happy to welcome them both into my home !

Before they arrived I had a talk with my children George and Charlotte and I informed them that Meghan was their new auntie, I also brought up the fact that they were going to be a pageboy and a flower girl at their wedding in a few months - they both were so excited, but especially my little Charlotte as she absolutely adored her aunt Pippa and she loved dressing up for her wedding the previous summer.. I was comforted when the children were happy & I took it as a sign that everything was going to be okay... I was wrong.

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