Alice Windsor | BRF Story

27.

Highgrove House, Gloucestershire

2005

Alice wished there was a better way to explain how the following month happened, how the month after she gave birth affected her so deeply and scarred her for the rest of her life. However, there really wasn't, because from the moment Alfred was put in his baby carrier and driven away by his new parents on that fateful Friday afternoon Alice simply shut every memory she had from her son in a box inside her heart, to be opened on occasions when the pain and uncertainty became too much, and then when she received the news that she was now no longer the mother of a son but of an angel, who had gone to meet the grandmother he had never knew and never met from the mother he barely got to know. 

The baby's doctor decided it was best that the baby spend its first month in England before flying anywhere and leaving its mother's side, which was both a blessing and a curse, as Alice would be able to see her son grow and delay through that first month, like any normal mother would. 

She took some of the responsibilities from Tiggy, as she became more and more attached to the idea of having her son beside her, and when she was well enough she started walking with him around the gardens, enjoying the last bits of what the British summertime could offer them, before both of them would be thrust into a very different climate. 

At the end of the month, when Alice just couldn't stay at the House anymore, she was able to convince her father to let her visit her mother's grave with Alfred, a first and last visit so that Diana's first grandchild would at least know he had been there, someway, somehow. After some convincing the Prince of Wales allowed and a tight escort was put in place so no one would find out Alice had been there, much less with a baby. 

In the month Alice had her son all to herself, where her father was loosely keeping an eye on whatever she was doing from Scotland and the only person who had bothered to visit was her older brother, William, Alice tried to cram in everything she could do with the baby, everything she could show her baby about her home country before he was whisked away from her to a more safe environment.

In the evening of October 10th, the same day her grandparents arrived from Scotland, she received a somewhat unexpected visit from the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh as she was having dinner in the living room and watching some television. 

"Granny. Grandpa."

"How have you been, dear?"

"Well, I think." Alice says, a little dizzy from the surprise visit and the sudden need to get up mid meal, after all she was expecting that evening to be one like any of the many others she had had these past few months. 

"Good, good." The Queen sits down on the chair opposite Alice, like she was waiting for something or someone, looking around, analysing the room around her. 

"Where's the little lad?" 

"Upstairs, Tiggy was giving him a bath and putting him to bed." 

It made her feel terrible as the words came out of mouth, as she noticed she wasn't the one actually taking care of her son, but her grandparents seemed little bothered, not at all actually, and the Queen simply got up and started walking out of the room, with the Duke behind her, like they knew exactly where their great-grandson was being put to bed. 

"I'll go with you." Alice yells, pushing her food onto the table and running behind her grandparents, who were already halfway towards the first floor, although Alice was almost certain they wouldn't know where to go from there once they got to the landing. "Over here."

She leads the way, passing her own room and saying a prayer, as she wasn't exactly sure how her grandparents would react once they saw little Alfred, and opening the door to the room where Tiggy was cleaning up the changing table and little Alfred was half-awake in his bassinet that was already becoming too small for his ever growing baby body. 

There's a moment of silence as Tiggy drops into a curtsy and leaves the room, with the door closing behind her with a soft click, before the Duke walks over to the bassinet, looking down at the rather fussy baby boy who had some of his own features that Alice herself had inherited over the generations. 

The Duke nods, placing his hands on the small temple of the baby before giving him a small smile and stepping aside so that his wife could meet her great-grandson. The moment felt too long for Alice to feel anything other than discomfort, as she hadn't felt comfortable and welcomed by her family when they learned of the whole situation. But as her grandmother gazed at Alice's newborn son, Alice's heart hurt and her stomach sank. Maybe, if things had been handled differently, if Alice had been a little more mature, Alfred could be welcomed as a full-blooded member of their family, without any of the prejudices she knew would if she changed her mind now.

"He's a beautiful babe. A good mixture of the two families I would say."

"Yes, I think so too." Alice was eager to please her grandmother, everyone was always to make her happy, she just wasn't sure what she was supposed to say to make her happy. 

"And he has your hair."

Tears pooled on the corners of her Alice's eyes as she looked away from her grandmother and her son, who was still fussing in his bassinet, clearly tired from the day's activities but unwilling to go to sleep. 

"He looks like an Alfred." 

Alice's opens her mouth, but no words come out and she wasn't exactly sure wha she was supposed to say. She had only told some people about naming Alfred, and of course nothing was official, as the new parents would probably change it for his own safety, but a wide smile appears on Alice's face as a tear slips down her cheek. 

The Queen looks back at Alice and with just a simple look the Princess knows what her grandmother means, and is quick to pick up her son and place him in her grandmother's arms, who carefully cuddle hims closer to her chest and face. The Queen whispers something against the baby's soft skin before looking up at her granddaughter, who was still cleaning away stubborn tears. 

"Are you sure about your decision?" 

There's a long minute before it dawns for Alice what exactly her grandmother is talking about, and when it does she is lost for words, because this is the first time someone is asking her if she wants to go back on her word, if she wants to keep Alfred with her, if she wants to make a decision that will surely change her life forever. 

"I..."