It Starts with Coffee

Ten

"I'm walking away because you were too busy finding faults in me while I was overlooking yours."
-UNKNOWN

~~

It's Monday.

I didn't sleep at all last night. Not even Liam's clothes could help me calm down. I tossed and turned all night about what the day will bring. Breaking up with Jack...I never thought this day would ever happen. Up until two days ago, I thought Jack was my endgame. I was going to marry him and have his babies. I knew my future and now I'm basically homeless sleeping on the couch I brought in a house rented by a guy I met three days ago.

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

It's a mess.

It's only seven am and I've vomited twice from stress and wanted to harm myself but thankfully I had the courage to tell Liam and he calmed me down by telling me about his home life. He grew up only twenty minutes from Kempton Prep so he saw his family regularly until he moved here. He is the youngest of five, and I'm the second born of four so we related to having a few siblings. It barely took ten minutes for the thoughts and feelings of harming myself to go away.

It's only seven am and I've already sent an email to the school with my registration and link to my application from Kempton Prep so they don't spam me with the "Are you sure this is the right decision?" emails that I do not want to deal with. After I break up with Jack, I'm going to see Gianna and explain everything and unfortunately quit. Then we're going to my apartment I shared with Jack and gathering everything that's mine that I want to keep and getting the hell out of there.

Then I'm going to apply for every job I can, I've almost got enough for a car but depending on how long it takes me to find a job I may have to tap into my car savings. It's not the end of the world and I can bus or walk to wherever the job will be.

I've officially come to the conclusion that the best step moving forward is moving to the city. It's the best option. The city is a thirty-minute drive..and about an hour and a bit bus ride away but it'll be the best place to avoid Jack and much easier to find a well-paying job and an apartment but it's far from Liam...

I feel sick again at the thought and I don't want to tell him that idea because I know he'll encourage it even if he doesn't want me to go.

"Are you ready to go?" Liam asks interrupting my thoughts.

"Yeah," I shrug. We leave the apartment without another word and the rest of the car ride is in silence. As we get closer and closer I feel more sick and panicky, Liam sees me struggling and reaches over to hold my hand. As he slides his fingers through mine I can finally breathe. I death grip his hand as he pulls into the student car park.

"Are you sure you want to do this alone?" Liam frowns as I let go of his hand.

"No. But I have to. I'll meet you at Gianna's and then we'll go to my apartment. Jack's exam finishes at twelve so we have a few hours to get everything done" I say as my hand hovers over the handle.

"Okay, just send me a text if you need anything. I can't fight..but I'll try" he smiles.

Despite my mindset, I laugh loudly, that gives me the courage to open the car door and leave. With a quick look back and a reassuring smile, I walk away from the car and walk to the back of the campus where the ovals are, Jack and his friends always hang out before and between classes.

Looking at the time on my phone, I see it's fifteen minutes before Jack's exam. I've timed this perfectly. He won't be able to follow me because he literally cannot miss this exam otherwise he'll fail the course.