Obstruction

It's My Life

- No Doubt, It's my life -

https://open.spotify.com/track/19EQUqnUXEeiBrY10JhPEF

- June 22nd -

The week after signing the contract was exam week.
Simon and I had an art history exam and a week to complete any unfinished mandatory artwork.
Oddball had two practical exams. Over in economics, Ellen and Ethan were set up for three exams.
Which meant minimal band time.
It felt absurd. We were due for a year of music, touring, stylists, music video and interviews. The exams felt so insignificant. My dream of visual arts was still there, but somewhat dwarfed in comparison to the adventure we were due to experience.
Penelope had hinted, before leaving the party, about the actual scale of what we had signed up for.
The goal for Mr. Summers was not to get us an album. His goal was to get us to the top.
Fast!
I was scared and exited at the same time. Fame was never in my plans, but somehow I had signed a deal where I would end up in the public eye. There was a relief to think I would not be alone.

I was hauling boxes of finished, assessed and approved art over to my mum's car when a ruffled looking guitarist came out from an exam with his hair sticking up in all kinds of directions.
I had to smile.
I could just imagine how he'd been sat for four hours with his hand in his hair tugging at it when he got to a complicated question.

Balancing the artwork from the exhibition on top of my boxes I started carrying it over to the car.

"Do you need a hand with that?" Ethan suddenly asked behind me, making me jump.

How the hell had he got across the courtyard that fast?

My chin was rested on top of my stack of stuff so I had to actually turn my whole body to see him.

"Or do you want me to fish the key out of your pocket when you get to the car?" He asked with a cheeky grin.

Before I could stop myself I felt my face melt into something between a frown and a deadpan smile.

"Just grab the top box," I said.

With a small nod he took both boxes and the Japanese inspired art off me and carried the whole stack over to the car for me.

I got the key and clicked the unlock button before opening the boot. Wordlessly I put the boxes in and prepared to shut the lid again.

"Can I have one of those?" Ethan asked before I could close the lid.

"One of what?" I asked and opened the boot again.

"I'd kinda like my Grandma to see what you did with her portraits," He shrugged.

"Sure," I said and picked up all my three paintings.

More than anything I wanted to look at him, but I couldn't bring myself to face him out of fear that he might see something in my eyes to turn us from this awkwardly functioning, friendly level.
Baby steps towards a functioning band.
The way my heart raced just from being so close to him was unnerving, while at the same time I felt so calm around him.
Safe.
Comfortable.

He took the paintings from me.

"All three?" He asked.

"Yeah. I kinda based them on your family, so if you want them, they're yours," I said, still studying the tips of his shoes while supporting my bottom on the back of the car.

Quietly he set the paintings on edge up against the side of the car, before he came over and stood next to me looking into the boot, his hands resting on the metal in front of him. His elbow nearly touching my upper arm was causing goosebumps to appear and the only thing stopping me from shifting that little distance closer was the sudden raw, acidic feeling in my chest.
I coud hardly breathe.