A Proscriptive Relationship

:A Proscriptive Relationship: 19

"You know it's illegal... right?"

I looked up from my dinner at Lance, who was frowning at me. I raised an eyebrow.

"Do I look stupid?"

Lance smirked. "Do you really want me to answer that?"

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "I know it's illegal, Lance. Just because I like-"

"Love."

"-Like," I repeated forcefully, "him, doesn't mean I will be romantically involved with him."

"You've admitted you love him!"

"It's something I will never repeat again, Lance," I told him, looking back down at my food and picking up a piece of steak and putting it in my mouth.

"Even when you confess?" he responded, sounding confused.

I nearly choked on the steak. I swallowed and looked at Lance, my eyes wide. "I'm not going to confess to him!"

Lance looked at me bewildered. "Why?"

"Because," I started, chewing on my lip.

"Because why?"

"It's illegal, Lance," I told him, looking at my lap. "Not only is it illegal, people think it's disgusting. Even just talking about it, people get these disgusted looks on their faces."

"That's why? You won't confess because people will think you are disgusting?"

I looked back up at Lance, surprised by his angry tone. He stared at me, his mouth twisted into a small scowl.

"It's not only that," I responded, casting my eyes down again. "He could lose his job. And I'd be in trouble too."

Lance scoffed. "So what?"

I stared at Lance in surprise. Wasn't he the one who said in the beginning of the year that it was creepy for a student to like a teacher?

"If you really love someone Holly, you wouldn't care about any of those things," he informed me, his mouth pressed into a firm, straight line. "There's nothing wrong with two people being in love! In a year, you won't even be a student anymore. And there isn't even that big of an age difference between the two of you."

My mouth was slightly open now. Lance clucked his tongue impatiently.

"Why do you care?" I managed to ask, still in slight shock by his outburst.

"Because, Holly," Lance started with a sigh. "You're my best friend. I care about you a lot, in a friend way," he added quickly.

I laughed. "Yeah, we've been over that."

"Anyways, I want you to be happy. And if being with that teacher is what will make you happy, I'm going to support it. Even if I don't like it. And if you say you can't be with him, I'm going to force you to be with him because I know that's what you want."

I suddenly felt like crying. My eyes were beginning to water, so I blinked rapidly to keep any tears from spilling over. I swallowed a lump in my throat too.

Lance was too sweet. He cared about me far too much more than I deserved from him. I wasn't nearly as kind to him.

Like the time I had left him all alone at the fair. And when he called to check up on me when he was worried I had just blown him off pretty much.

I was the hugest asshole ever.

"Whoa. Holly, what's wrong?" Lance asked, leaning forward. "Why are you crying?"