Sweet Revenge

I Will Go With You

I was crying at the bedroom, the only thing in my mind was Sigurd being killed, by the man I was in love. If Ivar was that unstable to kill his own brother, if I ever upset him in any way, my fate will be the same as Sigurd's.

I needed to leave that castle, but I didn't know how, Ivar will keep me here, but I'm scared of him. I don't know what to do, and what to say, all I know is my fear for Ivar, of being killed by him.

The door opened and Ivar crawled to the bed, but he didn't come any closer to me. I looked at him in the eyes, he was crying, I wanted to hug him, but every time I had that thought, Sigurd came to my mind.

"My brothers are planning Sigurd's funeral, they hate me, but I will not bear you hating me." That broke my heart, Ivar seemed so vulnerable, broken, maybe he was telling the truth.

"I do not hate you, I am scared of you." I whispered, but Ivar listened to me.

"You have to believe me, it was not my intention to kill Sigurd, anger clouded my judgement, he was my brother, I would never intentionally hurt him." Ivar came closer and closer to me, but I didn't flinch, I was still scared, but I needed him next to me at the same time.

"Give me time, I will not be scared of you." Through the tears, I could see a weak smile forming on his lips.

"I will give as much time you want, I can not loose you, Elfleda." He kissed my hands and left me, probably for Sigurd's funeral.

Ivar left the room, and I wanted to sleep, if I get enough sleep, I could feel better when I woke up.

***********************

I woke up with the sound of the door being opened, when I looked at it, I saw Ivar, he smiled to me and came closer, I was feeling better, and Ivar didn't scare me that much.

"I was worried, you slept for a whole day." He sat on the bed, but Ivar was careful not to touch me, but my body was craving for his touches.

"A whole day?" Ivar nodded.

"I came here to tell you that my brother Bjorn is going back to the Mediterranean, and Ubbe and Hvitserk will come with me, we will go to a town named York, and if you want to go and find your brother, I will not oppose." That made me frown, didn't he wanted me with him anymore?

"You want me to go away?" I was a bit hesitant of finding out his answer, but I needed to know, I would never be with anyone that doesn't want me.

"Gods, never. I was just giving you a choice, you ran away once because of me, I would rather give you the option this time." I didn't want to leave Ivar, simply because I didn't had anywhere else to go, and my brother was probably trying to find me, somewhere, so I was alone in the world.

But most importantly, I didn't want to leave Ivar, I was still in love with him, I wanted and needed to be close with him, feeling his skin against mine, being able to feel his heartbeat, having a life close to Ivar. Being happy like Asta was with my brother, that's what I wanted for my life, a life next to Ivar.

"I will go with you, and I would not want to go anywhere else." I smiled to him, I never saw Ivar so happy, he hugged me, tightly.

"You made me happy, very happy. We will leave in four days, Floki and Helga will come with us, and that little girl, I know you like her." Ivar was stroking my cheek, his touch was calming me.

"Tanaruz? That is great, I really like her." I smiled.

"I hope you can be close again, I want you, very much." Ivar was breathing heavily.

"I told you, Ivar. Patience, we will be close again, very soon." I kissed him, but that was my limit, but at the same time my body was screaming to respond 'yes', but I couldn't, at least not that time.

"Alright, I will wait. But that does not mean that you are going to sleep alone again, I want to share this bed with you." I could see that Ivar was afraid, but I wouldn't run away from him again, I loved him.

"Yes, but I am going to eat first, I am starving." We laughed.

"Of course you are, we can go have something to eat, come on." I followed Ivar, hoping I could eat something.