BLIND KAGEYAMA AU - Listen to my Voice

• first times •

Kageyama POV
Even without sight, I could feel all eyes on me.

It was quieter than the Karasuno I knew, there were more whispers than voices.

It wasn't like anyone at Karasuno particularly liked or disliked me, I just wasn't used to the amount of non verbal attention I was getting.

"We're just outside the main building Kageyama" He says, and signs us both in, before saying we're going to go up the elevator.

"Are we even allowed to?"
"Of course we're allowed to, you haven't even touched stairs since-"

Ding

"It's here"

During the ride up, he explains what's going to happen during the day.

"Alright, so first period you have a meeting with the vice principal and second is a private study session, then it's break time obviously. And then the councillor will see you third and fourth and finally they said you can go home early"

"It'd be great if you took this much time in your studies" I joke. He doesn't say anything.

The elevator dings, indicating that the doors have opened. We walk out and he takes me around.

The day was long and tiring. The meeting with the vice principal was awkward. 'congratulations, son' he said, although I'm confused as to what he's congratulating me about.

Nothing about this is worth celebrating.

The private study session was an introduction to braille. I didn't get it at all. I could barley read when I could see, and this was harder than learning english.

Throughout the breaks and counselling and whatever else I had to do during the day, Hinata was right there next to me.

"You know" I say during our lunch break as we go to the vending machine for some milk. "Maybe you should be focusing on your own studies"

He completely ignores me.

"Which one do you want again?" He says.
"Are you even listening to me?"
"Of course I'm listening to you... the plain one was it?"
"Stop ignoring me."

I try to grab his shoulder, but end up grabbing his wrist. It was small, even for Hinata, it felt like I was holding a stick.

"Listen Kageyama, you need to focus on yourself today, and tomorrow and for however long this lasts"

"They said it might last forever Hinata! Do you know how long that is!"

"I'm not talking about your blindness Kageyama!"

No one except the doctors has been so straight toward about it. It's like the word 'blind' is a bad word.

"Then what are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me. The breathing, the panic attacks, the constant look on your face that you're lost! I have no idea what your going through and all I can do for you is be a guide! I hate seeing you like this Kageyama why can't you understand that! I want you to hit me and call me dumbass and set to me but you can't. We can't, I just can't...."

He trails off and falls to the ground. He's crying and not even trying to hide it.

I kneel down to what I think is next to him.

I hadn't thought about him at all, or at least his feelings toward the situation. I felt like a burden and I suppose I thought that he felt the same.

"Hinata I-"

Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding

The bell that indicates the end of lunch goes off.