My Life From Hell (The Blooming Goddess #3)

The Cabin in the Woods (Part 2)

The inside of the cabin felt much larger than the outside. Very TARDISy. I stood in an airy foyer. Knotty planks of dark wood connected this space to the large living room and open kitchen off to one side. The furniture was all 1950s retro, with appliances in that special shade of mint green.

Her entire home smelled of coffee and chocolate. Two scents I could get behind. I liked her a bit more for it.

There was a lot of red and chrome furniture. From the "marbled" laminate table and matching vinyl chairs, to the curved, sectional sofa flanking a matching love seat. Awesome black and white portrait photos hung on the cream-colored walls in dark frames. I recognized Frank Sinatra and Ella Fitzgerald but the old-timey dude with a mustache was a mystery.

"Nikola Tesla," she said, following my gaze. "He's—"

I tore my eyes from the excellent decor to face my hostess. "A scientist guy. Yeah." Props to years of listening to Hannah. "Please tell me you're Aglaia, Goddess of Adornment, Splendor, and Beauty." I was careful to stay on her welcome mat, since I was still filthy.

She scowled. "Who saddles a child with that name? I mean really. There's not even a good nickname. Aggie?" She snorted. "I go by Jennifer."

"As in Lopez?"

"As in a name no one can mispronounce constantly. You know how tiresome that gets?"

O-kay. I held out a hand. "I'm—"

"I know who you are, Hurricane Sophie." She bent down to unzip her boots.

I scratched at my arms and tried not to go with my first impulse to mouth off to her. That didn't tend to go well in terms of getting goddesses on my side. I discounted my second impulse to blast her as well since, you know, same outcome.

This visit had been a gongshow so far. But I needed her help. Maybe the way to salvage things was to match her in cool factor. "Yeah, well, I'm here to get ink done." I said casually.

Jennifer kicked off her boots, then lined them up neatly against the wall. "You're zero for two now, camper. One more strike and you're out." Her eyes narrowed as they swung between me and her front door. "Literally."

Seriously? Now I was mad. As well as smoky, dirty, bleeding, and exhausted.

"First off," I said, counting off one index finger against the other, "I'm not the one who started the fire. And given the way you had the fire hose handy, I'm not the only client to bring trouble. Second of all ..." I replayed the last minute, trying to see how I'd offended her. I shook my head. "I got nothing."

Her expression hardened. "You're here to get a tattoo. Not get ink or have a tat done. So you can skip your wannabe urban slang."

Her condescension grated on me. I fixed her with a stare. "I guess a tramp stamp is out of the question?"

Jennifer laughed. Like the action surprised her. "Use the correct terminology next time," she said. "And don't ask me if I sling ink or use a gun either. Treat me and my art with respect. Capisce?"

"Capisce. And sorry. I didn't mean any offense." I really didn't. Also, antagonizing the one with the magic needle was never a good game plan.

The goddess eyed me up and down. "You'll need to take a shower first. I've got some of my sister's clothes. They should fit you. Follow me."

I unlaced my boots, slipped out of them, and left them on the mat.

She led me through the living room and down a corridor floored in the same dark wood.

I tried to think clean thoughts and not feel like Pigpen with my cloud of dirt.

Jennifer stopped and flung a door open to reveal a bathroom that could have held its own in a four-star spa. The walls were a soft, muted green. Gray slate tile covered the floor. The round sink, painted with tiny vines and flowers was cool but the shower was spectacular.

"Whoa," I breathed.

She preened. "I know." She motioned to the tiny stones of green, black and white embedded in the floor and wall of the shower stall. "Hand collected."

It was a wide stall, with no door. You simply stepped onto the rocks and turned to face the six shower heads jutting out from the sleek chrome fixture. I ran my hand over the stones on the wall. "I'm amazed you ever leave."

Jennifer smiled. "Sometimes it's tough. Get clean. I'll bring you some clothes, and when you're done just head right up the stairs." She left.

I peeled off my stinky outfit, turned the jets to full blast hot, and stepped under the spray. Magnificent as the shower was, it didn't stop me feeling jittery with nerves as I made my way up to Jennifer a few minutes later.

I tried to think reassuring thoughts as I climbed the stairs. All was not yet lost. I had until spring equinox and my final showdown against Zeus and Hades to sort all this out. Kai and I were prophesied to defeat them with a love ritual that would combine our powers and allow us to seize control of their minions.

One above one below alive awake a key it is no more it is no more.

It was the last bit of that prophecy that concerned me the most. Hopefully, this was the time to find out, once and for all, if Earth and everyone on it would gone by this time next week.

All because of me.