My Life From Hell (The Blooming Goddess #3)

Happy Freaking Birthday (Part 3)

With supreme will power, I dissipated my light and tightened my hold on the bottle of Midol, staring at the wall, until I was able to calm myself down and face her again.

"Do you think I don't know all that?" I got the cap off like a normal person, shook a couple pills directly into my mouth, and dry-swallowed them.

Hannah's face fell. "I'm scared for you," she whispered.

I set the bottle back down. I was going to lie but my eyes filled with tears, blowing a perfectly good strategy. "I'm scared for me too."

And that little admission broke me.

I'd tried so hard to keep a lid on my feelings. Keep everything going, and move forward with my eye on the prize. Ignore or deny whatever wasn't working, and focus on taking down Zeus and Hades. I checked the wards, and practiced the ritual. Not to mention all the physical training Theo had me doing, and the constant meditation to keep me all zen.

I'd been stressed, I'd been angry, and while I had to admit my iron will hadn't been all that strong given the rashes and headaches, I'd never felt the overwhelming panic that swamped me now. I started bawling. It was impressive. Giant snotty tears, body racking sobs, chest tightening anxiety, and through it all, Hannah hugged me tight, stroking my hair.

I cried out my fears that I would hurt Earth before I had a chance to save it, and that, when push came to shove, I didn't have the stuff of heroes. I cried out my heartbreak, finally admitting that my lifelong dream of having a mom who loved me and wanted me, was dead.

I wept for Kai and me, having gone so wrong when we should have been so flush-with-new-love right. I mourned the fact that I'd somehow become that girl I'd always mocked; the girl that, six months ago, I would have smacked upside the head and told to get some pride and some backbone because she deserved better. I had settled because, in the face of everything else that had happened with my family, I was clinging to whatever love crumbs I could get.

And finally, I cried for my death. Which might sound weird, but was oddly freeing. Even if I went into this final battle with all the odds on my side, something could go wrong. Dying was a very real possibility. So I let myself feel that death. Grieve the end of my existence.

Once I'd done all that and still come out the other side, I felt better.

Plus, eventually, I ran out of salt water.

I snagged a tissue from my bedside table to blot my tears, then turned red, puffy eyes to Hannah. "Thanks."

She shrugged off my gratitude and gently brushed away a lock of hair that had plastered itself to my forehead. Then she reached for the gold beaded evening bag that she'd thrown on my bed. She rummaged around and pulled out a small box in purple wrap, and tied with a gold bow. "Happy birthday, Soph."

I unwrapped it, swiping at my still damp eyes with another tissue but eager to see the gift inside. Hannah and I had a tradition of giving each other cute jewelry for birthdays. "Whoa," I said, as I lifted the cover of the box.

Nestled inside, against the black velvet lining was a wide silver wrist cuff made up of interlacing vines and leaves.

"It's gorgeous." I pulled it out, staring at it in wonder.

She took the bracelet from me and fitted it onto my right wrist. The weight felt comforting. "It's to remind you that you're the kick-ass Goddess of Spring. But mostly you're my best friend."

Girly hormone central. Apparently, I did have more tears left. And Hannah had to catch up.

Festos tromped in, pushing between us. "Ew! I am not having my arm candy looking like allergy sufferers. We have a birthday fête to attend." He pointed out the door. "Now get a hold of yourselves, go to the bathroom, and splash cold water on your faces. There is no crying in clubland."

At which point Hannah and I sandwich hugged him, getting tears all over Festos, too.

"Aw, man." He complained, but his arms came around both of us, so we knew he didn't really mean it.

The night picked up from there. The flood I'd let loose made me feel loads better. My Midol kicked in, too, and we managed to find a long-sleeved dress that really made me look good. Finally, it was on to finishing touches. I leaned back against the bathroom counter, holding still as Theo put smoky eye makeup on me. "Do I want to know why you're so good at this?" I asked, as he expertly smudged the corners.

"Nope."

"Thesi used to wear eyeliner all the time," Festos said, watching the proceedings.

My mouth fell open and I jerked my head to Hannah, totally incredulous. She stared back at me from her seat on the edge of the tub, her expression identical.

"You lie," Hannah accused Festos.

"Swear on the Styx," Festos replied, giving the sacred oath of the gods.

"And you kept this from us?" Hannah asked Theo.

"I wasn't going to wear eyeliner at Hope Park. Our school isn't that progressive. And thanks for moving your head," he groused. "Now I've got to do it over."

"But I could have been watching you wear it since we've been at Fee's," I protested as he clasped my chin in his hand to keep me still so he could fix his work.

"You get enough pervy thrills voyeuring when Festos and me kiss. I'm not encouraging any other kinks of yours."

Hannah cocked an eyebrow. "They been kissing much?"

Festos nodded enthusiastically before I could answer. "Tons."

Theo let go of my chin, stepped back, and looked at me. "We're good," he said and checked me over again. "Nyx good."