Searching- A saga ✔

58- Please....

Kanha, my dear, where are you?

My heart feels so drained, empty,

My soul, a whisper of promises,

Where are you, my Krishna?

My brain's short circuiting,

Panic dwells and multiplies,

Every minute, I discover more,

About myself and this world,

About you and thy manifestations,

Oh, Sri Hari, where are you?

My tears never seem to stop,

My heart never seems to stop,

My mind never seems to stop,

My time never seems to stop,

My earth never seems to stop,

It's too fast, for me, my world slips,

When realisations hit me deep.

Oh, Kanha, please come, please...

I need to speak to you.....

I need to cry to you.....

I need to laugh with you....

I need to sleep, peacefully, for once...

Kanha? Why are you so silent?

Please, Kanha, stop your games,

I am strong, but not strong enough,

To play against you and still win.

Kanha, without you, I am music,

That plays without notes.

I am the cloud without water,

I am a plant without roots and leaves,

I am a body without life.

Kanha, won't you answer me?

You are the God of Love,

My life is so blessed, dear,

To love you and only you,

From within every pore and atom

Of my complicated anatomy.

Kanha? 

Kanha?

Kanha......

I only have you left....

Maybe are you angry, that...

That I asked you to leave?

Kanha? Please say something...

My eyes are tired of spilling salty water,

They aren't oceans like you,

Krishna, you are testing my patience....

Are you too busy protecting the world?

That you fail to notice this mess of a girl,

Who is lost in the whims of Samsarical Maya?

Maybe, I just don't love you enough...

Maybe, I am just the same Kali infested soul,

Tainted, corrupted, sullied, impure,

I'm tired of waiting, Kanha, just tired.

My life has probably been a big lie,

Maybe, it was all an infatuation,

You, your leelas, a big hero worship,

When they told me that the journey

Was long and alone must I walk,

I didn't believe them, not an ounce.

But, today, the world is proving that

Over and over and over and over again.

And then some more, to break me.

You tried your best, Kanha, I understand,

But, I'll never change, Kali kills kindly,

You know me, Kanha, I think a lot,

I feel a lot, and I blame a lot.

Kanha.....

Please, I am drowning in my emotions,

Only you can build a dam, and hold

My pieces together, broken glass cannot mend,

But, You can mend pretty much anything, Kanha....

The four walls jail my soul,

I want to roam the forests with you,

They are constricting my love,

They are choking the burning wick,

They are pushing me more into Maya,

They are chaining my wings down,

I can't bear this anymore, Madhava,

I am tired of being made to wait,

I am tired of being ignored,

 I am tired of being lost,

Kanha, please, my dear, please,

Please come to me, tonight,

I can only implore and beg you,

Krishna?

Your silence slowly slips secretly,

And makes me go insane.

I don't have the strength to play,

To your whims and fantasies anymore,

Just come and hold me close,

And we can roam the forests together,

I know you have other tasks,

But Kanha, please.....

Please, come....

I await your arrival.....

Please...

Kanha, please....