Me- Hey let's go get some breakfast. I want pancakes.
Lauren- We can't get pancakes.
Me- Why not?
Lauren- It's summer.
Me- So?
Lauren- Well, they're seasonal. Aren't they?
Me- Get in the car. We are going to IHOP before I change my mind.
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The other day we were in the car and Lauren was with me. She was listening to her music on her phone with her earphones. All of a sudden I see her messing with the volume control on my car radio.
Me- What are you doing?
Lauren- Trying to higher the volume on this thing.
Me-Is it working?
Lauren- No. I told you not to buy me the cheap headphones.
Me- Yeah, sorry about that. How bout trying the volume control on your phone and not my car?
Lauren- Oh, yeah, my bad.
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Lauren- I'm going to give my children numbers instead of names.
Me- Uh Okay. Why?
Lauren- Just sounds cooler. Like 247.
Me- Exactly how many kids do you plan on having?
Lauren-Oh I don't know. Or maybe I am just going to make up names so they can have original names.
Me- Like what?
Lauren- Antares.
Me-That's a star in the Scorpius constellation.
Lauren- Oh okay. How about Bellatrix?
Me-That's a blue star in the Orion system.
Lauren-What about Gemma?
Me-Well that's not an uncommon name. Plus it's a star in the Corona Borealis.
Lauren-Damn I thought I made all those up. Instead I am just an expert on stars!
Me-You didn't even know they were stars! You just forgot we saw a show about constellations a few weeks ago on the History Channel and wanted to give your kids names you thought you made up!
Lauren- Too late. I'm gonna be an asteroidologist.
Me- An asteroidologist?
Lauren- Yeah.
Me- I am going to have you sterilized.
YOU ARE READING
Blonde Moments: Life with a blonde teenage daughter.
Non-FictionMy daughter, as smart as she is, sometimes says the craziest things. This is a collection of actual quotes that came directly from her. You can't make this stuff up. I blame it on her hair.
