It's complicated

20:

I couldn't understand why he told me he regretted being with Veronica? And that he never loved her.

We were in drama class discussing the play. Ma'am asked Xavier and I if we sorted out everything and he nodded.

I can't believe he did that. He did as I asked him to. We didn't really talk much after class. I'm not sure why it bothered me I mean things used to be this way before I knew him.

Why should it be any different now? Maybe it bothers me because of everything that's happened between us. Maybe it bothers me because of the way he made me feel when we were together.

Maybe it's because he showed me a different side of life, better yet a different side of me. Ah Claire do you hear yourself. Get over him, get over it and just move on with your life.

It's not like the world is gonna end when you're not with him. Another thing I couldn't understand was why he agreed that we sorted things out when we didn't?

Why would he do that? I was on my way to my next class when I saw a new girl walking through the doors. She passed him and he stopped her like he did with me once before.

Worst is I couldn't avoid him because my class was that way. Suck it up Claire you'll be fine. You can do this. So I held my head up high and passed him. 

Drew stopped me but I told him we'd talk later I had to class. The rest of the day was quiet I didn't see him or her. But I had a feeling that lunch would be different.

As I entered through those doors my heart pounded against my chest. I had a fear that what I would see would crush everything in me.

Since when did I become so dependant on one person's attention. When I looked over to his table my heart shattered.

She straddled him and they were full on making out. That was it I was gonna break him even if it meant breaking my own heart.

I saw Luke waving me over and I went there.

"Where'd you go last night?"

"I didn't feel so well so I decided to go home. You know, didn't wanna mess up your party."

"You couldn't even if you tried. See Xavier got someone new, a new toy."

"Can we not talk about him please?"

"Sure, wouldn't wanna upset you for no reason."

"So did you at least enjoy the rest of your party?"

"It was better when you were there."

"We'll do so again don't worry."

The rest of lunch was filled with small talk. Luke offered to walk me to class and I took up the offer. We all had the same class now.

I entered the class, sat on the table infront of Luke and saw Xavier approaching with that girl. I had a plan, I pulled Luke closer and kissed him.

At first it was only supposed to be a peck but damn this boy knew what to do with those lips. So our peck turned into a make out session. I could feel his eyes on me but whatever I couldn't care less.

This was part of my plan to break him. And if it works I'm happy. We broke the kiss when the final bell rang for class to begin. 

I could see Xavier was caught off guard. Class wasn't filled with much excitement. We were now at rehearsal once again. Things were still tense between us I could sense it but we both seemed to put our differences aside to make a success of this play.

Ma'am was impressed with our cooperation. Rehearsal went pretty well and once we were done I made sure to get away from him as fast as possible.

I got in my car and breathed in and out. He knocked on my window but I ignored him. Then he opened my door. Seriously I thought kissing Luke would make him go away so that I could forget him.

"(Xavier)Challenge accepted."

"What are you talking about?"

"You probable saw me and her kiss."

"So what if I did."

"Then you kissed Luke."

"Your point is?"

"If you wanna play this game we can. I like a good challenge."

"I don't know what you think your achieving but I can assure you I didn't kiss him to make you jealous. You told me to leave you alone, and I asked you to do the same problem solved."

"I find it so flattering that you think I'll actually be jealous if you kiss Luke. Seriously Claire."

"How's your mother."

"She's seen better days. Don't change the topic."

"I'm not I'm asking a simple question."

"Anyway I just came to tell you that I accept your challenge."

"What are you..."

"I'm not done. If you want us to break one another, we'll do just that. Let's see how badly we can hurt one another."

"Xavier..."

"Have a good day Claire."

For pork sake I wasn't planning on doing that. I mean yes I wanted to break him but I didn't want him to do the same.

I got home and felt like taking a nap since I was tired. But somehow I couldn't fall asleep. He was on my mind. Oh how I wished things had been different.

Because I wanted to hurt him so badly but thinking of everything now I think I overreacted. I picked up my phone to text him.

I wanted him to come over so that we could sort out things. So that we could cuddle and just forget about everything.

But I figured going to his house would be better. He wasn't gonna answer my calls or texts. So I got in my car and drove over to his place.

I reached his house and knocked on the door. She opened the door. She was in nothing but her underwear.

"Hi I don't think we've properly met. I'm Livy."

"Is Xavier here?"

"I don't think we've met. What's your name again?"

"Claire."

"Oh so your Claire."

"Yeah is Xavier here?"

"He's up in the room, can I leave a message?"

He came down in nothing but sweats. Damn he looked so fine.

"Can I help you Claire?"

"Nevermind. This was a bad idea enjoy your night."

I left, my place felt empty. I was so upset I got into bed and fell asleep. I knew I was irreplaceable but damn I didn't think it was that easy.