It's complicated

25:

He dropped me off at home. We both agreed that some time apart could do no harm. After all it wasn't like we were dating or anything we merely are friends.

I cooked and cleaned before hitting the shower. I had just gotten out of it when my phone rang. It was Xavier.

"Claire I can't sleep, this thing with my mom is freaking me out."

"Xavier love breath. You can come over."

"Can you open please. Kinda just drove over here and hoped that you would say yes."

"I'm on my way."

I opened the door and he looked slightly shocked when he saw me in my towel.

"Was this part of your plan or are you actually planning on dressing?"

"Oh no I got out of the shower just before you called that's why I haven't dressed yet."

"Okay well I'll leave you to dress then."

I got dressed and joined him on the couch. He seemed troubled.

"What's going on."

"I can't help but think and feel like that was her goodbye. Damnit Claire I can't lose her now. I still need her."

"Xavier stop. She's gonna be fine okay. Don't talk like that."

"Except Claire it's everything but fine. My mother is sick in hospital. She can die any moment. I could lose my mother damnit."

"Xavier I know how you feel believe me."

"How could you possible know."

"I lost a father Xavier. I know how it feels."

"Claire I'm so..."

"Don't be it gets easier as time passes. You learn how to deal with it."

We were interrupted by Xavier's phone ringing. Oh lord I hope it's not what I think it is. He went outside and answered the phone. I couldn't hear what was happening so I waited for him to come inside.

Once he entered he fell on his knees infront of me with tears in his eyes.

"She was supposed to be okay, Claire. She was supposed to come home. She was supposed to be there for us. She was supposed to yell at me for leaving my laundry everywhere..."

"Shhh. I know it hurts babe I know. You'll be okay, it's not gonna be okay but it will get easier believe me. I'm here for you."

He was crying like a baby in my lap with his hands holding my legs. I've never seen Xavier broken but this was enough to shatter my heart.

He got up to go and rinse his face and I went to check on him. He looked terrible.

"Xavier is there something I can do for you?"

He motioned for me to come closer. I hugged him tight to comfort him. He didn't stop crying for one minute. I could feel the tremble of his whole body as we stood there in silence.

He looked up at me with red eyes. Why did someone like him deserve to lose the one person he needed the most?

He was never gonna ever get the chance to talk to her ever again. He's never gonna get a hug or kiss from her. She's not gonna cook another meal. She's not gonna yell at him for not picking up his clothes. She's not gonna be around to take care of everyone when they need it.

She's gone and even though I didn't know her that well she came to be very close to my heart. I came to accept her as my own mother.

She was so special and they'll miss her dearly. He was broken and I don't blame him. As he looked up into my eyes I could see nothing but a broken boy that has lost everything he ever cared about.

I couldn't contain my tears when I saw his streaming down his face.

"Make it stop Claire. Take the pain away. Please I'm begging you."

"Xavier love I want to I really do. But what can I do? I can listen if you need to talk but you're gonna have to do the healing on your own."

"Claire..."

I kissed him and he lead me to my room. This was happening was it. Maybe this was what he needed. Maybe and just maybe it would make him feel better.

I pushed him over and straddled him. He didn't hesitate to cup my face and kiss me. His lips were so soft and welcoming. He pulled away and looked me in my eyes before kissing me on my neck.

His hands slowly moved up my legs. As he reached my upper thighs he pushed my dress up and rested his hands on my hips.

"If your gonna do it do it right."

"Claire love what are you talking about?"

"If your gonna take my dress off take it off completely or leave it."

"You sneaky little girl."

He removed my dress as I undid his jeans button. His shirt came flying off and displayed that perfectly good looking abdominal area.

Damn it should be a crime to look that good. He pushed me over and got on top of me. Once again not hesitating when it came to kissing. He kissed his way all down my body.

And it sent shivers everywhere. Damnit how was one boy so good at this. Once our lips collided it was over there was no going back now. My hands were in his hair while he unclipped my bra. Soon not only my underwear but his were off.

Our bodies moving to the same rhythm but this time things were different. He wasn't playful and happy like the first time. He was sad and broken which kinda made this 50 times better than the first time.

I felt amazing, like I was reborn. And he seemed to enjoy every moment and that made me happy. I didn't wanna see him sad, I wanted to see him happy.

"Claire you are one amazing person. Thank you for making me forget and feel better."

"It's what I do in times of need."

"Well then I'm gonna be more needy I guess."

"Slow down cowboy I don't just give out things. You have to earn it."

We showered after and he looked like he felt better.  I was content. He slept over, my idea. I didn't want him driving feeling the way he does, accidents happen to quickly.