𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙎𝙖𝙞𝙠𝙞.𝙠 𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙩𝙨

ɴᴏʀᴍᴀʟ ᴄᴏɴꜰᴇꜱꜱɪᴏɴ → ꜱᴀɪᴋɪ ᴋᴜꜱᴜᴏ

Watching Satou get rejected should be sad. But it's not sad, it's clearly the epitome of normalcy in the making: the average boy confesses to his class idol (who can not compare to Teruhashi) and promptly gets rejected. A "Sorry, I've never thought of you in this way" should be disheartening, but to Saiki, it's perfect, beautiful. While it is depressing that Satou's class idol can't see the loveliness in being plain, Saiki can. Satou's confession was mundane; store-bought chocolates and a note in the spirit of Valentine's Day. It's how a background character should confess their affections.

For Saiki to shake off the curse that is his disastrous life, he too must undergo this ritual. Minus the discouraging rejection of course, but still boring and mundane in a sense Saiki wishes he could be. Not to say that Satou's confession wasn't special. It's everything a person could want in a run-of-the-mill confession. But when you're surrounded by weirdos like Nendou and Kaidou, all you see is chaos.

Yet you come in without the chaos those two bring. You're the refreshing part of Saiki's life; whenever he sees you, he can sigh in relief and relax around you. Your smile lights up his day because when you smile shenanigans don't ensue. Your laugh is comparable to Satou's – not that you're ordinary but that you don't give him a splitting headache (most of the time). Kaidou and Nendou are terrible influences on you, and Saiki would much rather limit any of your interactions (Saiki can't have them disturb you, can he?).

When did it begin? When did Saiki stop looking towards you for peace and quiet, and start looking at you because he could? When did it all change? Time is lost to Saiki. After all, he can repeat this year and fall in love with you all over again.

What is more ordinary yet beautiful than confessing on Valentine's day? Absolutely nothing. You deserve a nice, peaceful confession with chocolates and a letter. How would you react to the letter? It'd be a lie to say Saiki hasn't asked how you feel about him (through Kaidou, of course). For once, his powers had been a bit useful if not once again unethical. Saiki knows you feel the same way. It doesn't diminish your right to the perfect but ordinary confession that Saiki will give you.

After all, what sort of confession begins with "I read your mind and we both feel the same way, let's date?". that won't draw attention to Saiki. And he can't have that.

Saiki's prepared. In between battling Kusuke, he's written the letter. It's on A4 paper, written in clean ink. The words are plain but are directly related to you – just the way a normal confession should be. Saiki folded it neatly – almost too neatly, he had to crease it a little bit – and placed it into a peach-colored envelope. The letter's perfect.

The problems begin with the chocolate.

The chocolate is simply put, hard. Not because it's hard to afford. Saiki's donned on the 100-yen man suit way too many times to not have the money to buy you the chocolate. It should be easy.

The first major problem begins with the ordinary chocolate Saiki buys from the store downtown. It's neatly wrapped in its packaging, waiting to be placed with your envelope until it's not. Saiki doesn't know what happened. He blinked and there was a chocolate bar in his mouth. It did not make sense. Perhaps this was a plot from Kusuke but Saiki can't give you a half-eaten chocolate. With a definitely reluctant face, he sadly eats the rest of the chocolate. It hits Saiki when he's done tearfully gobbling the chocolate that he could've reverted it. Drat.

"Hey pal, is the chocolate really good?" The second problem comes with Nendou appearing like a parasite. No matter how hard Saiki tires, he can't shake off the leech that is Nendou. Saiki would teleport if not for the crowded area. He could teleport in front of Nendou and the poor boy wouldn't even notice.

"Leave me alone." Nendou does not leave Saiki alone, which leads to the third major problem. This time, Saiki buys a chocolate flower. It's a bit on the "fancy" side and Saiki's wallet feels a lot lighter but you should love these chocolates—

And Nendou takes a bite. "Thanks for buying me the chocolate buddy!" if it wasn't for the fact that a miscalculated punch could kill Nendou, Saiki would've hit him. Saiki can't revert the chocolate flowers as they were made fresh. He can't hand you flour and eggs and hope for the best.

Shaking off Nendou proves to be impossible. The fourth problem comes in the form of the Valentine-themed coffee jelly. One – the price is insanely high when it's the exact same ingredients inside. Saiki knows, he's read the label twice. Two – he still buys it. Three – as much as he cares for you the coffee-jelly still ends up padding his belly. Sorry. It was delicious, though.

The fifth problem comes with the stores closing. No more store-bought chocolates. At least in Japan. Perhaps Saiki could've apported some of the chocolates into his hand but he has nothing of value on him.

While he could ask his mother to make chocolates, its not ordinary at all to bring homemade chocolates for Valentine's day. Perhaps a relationship between you and him was ill-fated, destined to never happen.

At least, that's what Saiki thinks until you hand him a bar of chocolate with an envelope of your own attached to it. "It's for you!" Is what you say, "I really like you, Saiki". While this isn't how Saiki envisioned things to happen, what sort of person would he be to refuse? He doesn't refuse. He takes your chocolate and bites it – it's the exact same chocolate that caused the whole sequence of problems. It's as delicious as he remembers.

"Thank you. I like you too." Saiki will just have to offer you something for White Day. Maybe he'll give you the letter then, too.