14 | spiral

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𝓢𝓮𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 11𝓽𝓱 2021

⚠️tw: bullying

°·.¸.·°¯°·.¸.·°¯°·.¸.->   🎀  𝒶𝓊𝓇🍪𝓇𝒶'𝓈 𝓅♡𝓋  🎀   >-.¸.·°¯°·.¸.·°¯°·.¸.·°

I woke up in such a good mood and here I am now spiraling down in my own negative thoughts thinking twice about whatever I have going on with Adrian. Let me take you guys back to this morning to know what the hell happened.

Flashback:

I got up with a small smile on my face, I felt so good and refreshed that I went out to the gym before coming back to the dorm for a shower before heading out to the café. I felt so good and confident after my date with Adrian that I even felt the need to put on a cute outfit even though I was just going out to my everyday café. Bella had some errands to run that day so she wasn't joining me.

cute fit-

I felt so cute in my outfit as I was doing some studying, while I was going through some notes the bell rang

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I felt so cute in my outfit as I was doing some studying, while I was going through some notes the bell rang. The bell that rang whenever someone came into the café. I was so immersed in my work that I did not know what was happening around me until I felt a light shove on my shoulder and a squeaking sound of the last voice I never wanted to hear again.

"OMG AURORA?! IT'S BEEN SO LONG."

That voice belonged to the one and only, devil of high school, the reason why I dreaded school, Tiffany. Let me take you back to when I mentioned there were other reasons why I was so insecure, that other reason is Tiffany. It is crazy how someone so irrelevant comments and actions can cause so much pain to another.

"LOOK AT YOU, still wearing those disgusting outfits, you really do need help with your choice of outfits" she commented.

And there my friends has just shattered my confidence in my choice of clothing. Tiffany is those typical mean girls from high school, 'queen bee' of the school with influencing parents who coincidentally worked for my parents. She couldn't help but pick on me every.single.day. of high school. You know when someone has already caused you so much pain that you are so frightened to not even know what to reply, well that was me.

"you're still in school? holy shit, If you didn't know I have just started my own make-up line, maybe you could try it. I do think it would help you a lot." Her disgusting voice continued.

"I have also just gotten a boyfriend, I think you would know him, he is one of the top models that I work with. Let me guess, you are single? Not surprised, you aren't good enough for any guy." This. This just broke my heart. When she mentioned if I was single, my mind straight went to Adrian but her next comment just broke my heart. I was dead silent and scared to reply, afraid of what she may do next. In high school I was not just a victim of mental but also physical bullying by her and her 'clique' of girls.

I knew I could not mentally handle it anymore it so I quickly got my laptop and started rushing towards the exit when I felt someone tug my arm.

"leaving so fast? I thought you may want to share a part of your miserable life with me" she added while chuckling that only creeped me out more. I shrugged off her arm and ran out of the shop.

End of Flashback

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I got back to my dorm with teared stained cheeks and jumped into my bed balling my eyes out contemplating everything she had said. Bella was not home so I cried and cried until it hurt to cry more. And now I am drowning in my own negative thoughts and memories from the past that keeps coming back to my mind even after years of trying to suppress and move on from it.

This brought me back to high school when Tiffany and her group had accidentally bumped into me, making all my food splash onto my own clothes in front of the whole cafeteria. I locked myself in the toilet to clean myself up and drown in my own thoughts crying like the little bitch I am.

'was I not good enough?' 'were they right about everything they said to me? is that why no one likes me?'

This went on for the majority of high school and I myself was too afraid and embarrassed to confront my family. My family was successful and powerful while here I am, a coward, a weakling, I was afraid I would become the embarrassment of my family and make my family look at me with pity and disappointment. I hid all my problems from my family and put on a fake front to my family telling them everyday that school was great, I thought everything would be over by the end of high school;I was so wrong. Tiffany and her friends haunt my dreams and are the cause of my nightmares until now. I feel so weak, I let someone so irrelevant cause me so much pain and distress.

Now I am thinking back to when she said I do not deserve any guy, I slowly letting her comments creep into my brain. Someone like me does not deserve someone as great as Adrian.

'maybe I am not good enough for Adrian, he would be so much better off without me.'


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HEYY BESTIES, HERE IS SOME DRAMA SOO YUHHH. HOPEFULLY THIS CHAPTER WAS INTRIGUING.

LET ME KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS CHAPTER, LOOK OUT FOR THE CHAPTERS AFTER THIS, WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT?

I ALSO WANTED TO MENTION THAT I LOVE AND APPRECIATE EACH AND EVERY COMMENT YOU GUYS COMMENT, THE FACT YOU TOOK THE TIME JUST TO COMMENT IN MY STORY MEANS A LOT TO ME.

ANYWAYYY Thank You for reading!!

HOPE U ENJOYED!! vote&comment xx

『爱』

- _foreveryours.

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