I'm Sorry For Being Me (Phan/KickTheStickz) Book One- COMPLETE

Phil's POV

I hadn't called Dan since I left. I've asked about him a lot though. According to Pj, Chris is visiting him right now.

"Phil, you never did tell me why you left." Pj said. I looked up. "You never asked." I told him simply. Pj scoffed. "Fine, then. Why did you leave Dan's?" "I don't want to talk about it..."

"Truth or dare!? What's that? You pick truth? Okay! Why did you move out of your old house!?" I rolled my eyes. "I needed to get away."

Pj frowned. "You suck at lying, so tell me the truth. Why?" "Why, what?" "For the love of- Why did you move out!?" Pj yelled. I winced. "Because... I'minlovewithhim..." I mumbled. "Sorry? Didn't catch that."

"I said, I'm in love with him." I said quietly. "What?" "IM IN LOVE WITH HIM!!!" I yelled.

I stood up. "Why does that mean you need to move out!?" "Because I never thought someone like him would like someone like me!" "Oh yeah? And what's someone like you then?" Pj questioned.

"A fat, pathetic, lonely loser, who drives away the people he loves when he finds out that they love him back!" I said, frustrated. How could he not see me like that!? Pj frowned.

"You're not fat. I think you're too skinny. You're not pathetic, you are one of the most famous YouTubers around, and you most certainly are not lonely, considering the fact that I am visiting you right now as we speak!" He complained.

I frowned. "Just because others think that, doesn't mean I do." "Just because you don't doesn't mean others shouldn't." "People are free to there opinion." I told him.

"And your fans?" Pj asked. "What about them." "You haven't made videos since you left. Come on, Phil! You need to talk to Dan. You already know what will happen. Do you not want to be happy!?"

"I don't think I deserve to be happy."

"Phil, that's stupid. Everyone deserves to be happy. You know that Dan will want you. You want him too!" Pj said.

"I know that I want him, but why should he want me after leaving for such a stupid reason!?" I asked.

"Phil! Just call him!" Pj said, holding out his phone. I shook my head and pushed his phone away. "Fine then, Phil. I'm leaving." Pj said, putting on his shoes and coat. I watched him quietly.

He slammed the door, and I heard him press the button for the elevator. I sat down on the floor.

Why do I lose everyone that I care for?

~Author's Note~

Ooh, drama! I'm going to make Dan have a boyfriend. Either Chris or Pj. Could you tell me who you think Dan should try to get over Phil with? I was thinking of having Pj kiss Phil in this one, but I didn't think that Phil would want him to do that. So I didn't. But tell me!

Chris or Pj? Who's it gonna be?

MAKIN' BACON PANCAKES!