Alice in Borderland | Transmigration

Chapter 35

You stared at the dimmed picture of the victim.

You didn't know what to feel. Guilt? You could have saved him if you had insisted hard enough. Plus, it wouldn't matter because you're not relying on Urumi's group to tell you your symbol. Resignation? Because you had tried, maybe half-heartedly, but you had thrown Banda under the bus for it.

You turned away and coincidentally met Banda's intense gaze. You immediately stiffened. You felt his eyes rake over you, and you tried your best to look unfazed. You had a sneaking suspicion that Banda knew of your little betrayal.

Retreating back to safer territory, you headed downstairs to check up on Chishiya and Ippei. Sure enough, Urumi's group was situated near the tables, chatting away. You immediately noticed Enji also near the shelves, lingering. You watched him a bit longer, but he made no move to reach for any snack and just stood there. Was he spying on Urumi's group?

You walked over.

"Hey."

He jumped, turning to look at you with a panicked and weary expression. You held up your hands in a placating manner, "woah, it's okay. Why so jumpy?"

He averted your gaze. You've finally met someone who was worse at eye-contact than you were. You were going to speak again, but he snatched a cookie with black packaging off the shelves and rushed off. You hadn't forgotten what Chishiya had said about the pact he made with the business woman.

"Hey! Ms. Murderer!"

You turned around, brow furrowed as you registered Urumi waving at you from the tables. You hesitated, but then started making your way over. As you were walking, Urumi shooed off the person that was sitting next to her, and patted the seat when you arrived. Tentatively, you sat.

Her face was in her palm, the rest of her group looked pretty shaken. You wondered if she's already proposed killing off another person.

"Are you the Jack of Hearts?"

It was sudden and so unexpected that you almost choked on nothing.

"What?" You stammered.

She cocked her head, "are you the Jack of Hearts?"

"No!" You exclaimed, "I'm not–"

The old woman scoffed at you, and your gaze flickered over, "I wouldn't be surprised if you were."

Scowling, you stated, "I'm not the Jack of hearts. I'm not a murderer either."

"Oh really?" The old lady jibed, "I do remember you shooting another militant. Killing him."

Your anger flared.

"I saved you! You saw me save you yet you– you–" you floundered, your Japanese failing you, "you accused me anyway!"

She snickered, "save me? You almost shot me and my child!"

"It was an accident! You two fled before I could explain myself!"

"Accident?" She roared, "no one shoots a gun with so much malicious intent–"

"Malicious intent?" You stood up, slamming your palms onto the table and seethed, "I saved you. I saved your stupid life along with your child's."

You jabbed a finger in her direction, "without me, you would be dead right now!"

You didn't get to hear her reply and stormed off. You don't know why you got so worked up, but you blamed it on the game's atmosphere for putting you on edge.

You didn't get to storm very far, as when you turned a corner, you froze at the sight of Banda sitting on the floor, head turned in your direction.

His face made no visible change upon seeing you, and you had half a mind to just walk away when he spoke.

"So you are a murderer."

You clenched your fists, and decided to be the bigger person. You were going to continue walking away, but he didn't stop.

"You're hiding behind your hero complex. You think you saved her, but does that really excuse your sin?"

Fuck being the bigger person.

You whirled around, "it was one life for two! Or even more, he was a militant!"

"Who are you to judge the weight of a human life?"

You hesitated.

"Maybe that guy would be the one to 'save' us all, maybe he would be responsible for something bigger. But you killed him off. What if you indirectly killed off millions of people? Can you even live with yourself?"

Your mind was crashing. Steamrolling off the edge. "Don't talk to me like that. Aren't you a serial killer? You have no right to say this."

"Oh," he started smiling, "but I don't care about the consequences, can you say the same for yourself?"

"Yes, I don't care." You had blurted it out just to retaliate against his words, but you and him both knew that you didn't mean it.

"What's your problem anyway?"

"I don't have one."

You glared at him, "but I do. Keep an eye on your pet. He's the Jack of Hearts."

His eyes bore into you, "oh? Such confidence."

"You'll regret it if you don't listen."

"I'm listening."

You shot him a serious look, and became slightly frustrated at his blank expression. 

"Tell me my symbol."

You don't know why you said it, you don't even know why you had the thought, but your mouth moved faster than your mind. 

You swore you saw a speck of surprise in his dead eyes.

You didn't even wait for his response, and turned around to reveal your symbol. There was a beat of silence.

"Clubs."

You didn't even spare him a glance, and then walked off.