Ad astra per aspera
- To the stars through difficulties
☾ ☾ ☾
Aeris struggled to sleep.
The constant panic of what she had done falling over her in waves of fear and regret, pulling at her fingertips and brushing against the depths of her mind.
Each creak of the cramped stairs pushing her heart into frantic thumps against her chest, the smallest of whispers making her believe she had been found out.
"Stop"
Her breath fogged against the cold glass, head pushed into her hands as she exhaled ever so slowly, pleading - begging - for the voices in her head to halt, crying for the violence that brewed below the layers of her skin to cease, mourning for the impossible future she brought upon herself and yet -
"please"
Aeris knew what she was capable of , she had known from the day she had sneaked into her fathers library and into the farthest section to escape from the tutors and guardians she had been imposed with.
Realised it the day she opened the dust ridden notebook with its pages missing and read her name at the beginning of each line, believed it when the voices had appeared in her mind and the power began to show its signs.
She had know it from the day she accidentally killed her friend.
But no one believed her.
leaving it off as childhood fantasies and a lot of bad pastries eaten at lunchtime, laughing at her ridiculous attempts of trying to convince her parents of the fact that the voices in her head had told her to do it, scoffing when she said she couldn't trust herself anymore.
And the voices had continued to grow, and so had her fears.
Creeping through the walls of her bedroom and following her back to the depths of her mind, leaving behind traces of its presence - its sickness - with glee, poisoning her from the inside and destroying her soul with the promises of something more, something different, something she could never have.
If only she would embrace it, if only she agreed to surrender.
And so she had prayed, leaving her faith to the gods of the past with blessings of gold, silver and rubies salvaged from the depths of the treasury and buried deep in the earth with pleas of taking it all back, whispers of letting her take back her life and lingering tears that coloured the the soil a shade darker than before each time.
But they never answered.
And yet the power continued to grow.
And after time, so did she.
☽ ☽ ☽
The morning welcomed her with the shouts of passing by merchants and the tingling of the breakfast bell downstairs.
Aeris blinked her eyes, squinting to adjust to the new surroundings before delving further into the blankets with a groan, fingers curling around the thin blanket and toes that peeked out from the other end.
This wasn't how she got usually got up.
This was very different from what she was used to.
Light footsteps padded down the dust ridden stairs, wood groaning with each step downwards while the chatter of people continued to grow.
The dingy little corridor opened into a much larger room, the smell of freshly baked goods filling the air and making her stomach rumble, the crowds gathered outside the doors and sitting by the windows are their fill with laughs from their neighbours and smiles from passer-by's.
No one seemed uncomfortable, passing glances as if praying to escape or shouting at the owners to hurry up.
They didn't seem to care.
The foreign feeling his Aeris with the greatest of amounts, eyesight blurring before bringing itself back to focus to the same scenery as before.
Her hand reached forward, looking around enthusiastically, hoping to capture the moment in her memory and trying to ignore the feeling of it disappearing before she walked in.
"Well, are you just going to stand there or get moving?"
Aeris stumbled, whipping her head around to catch face of the prim voice that had just spoken, eyebrows furrowing with discomfort of being spoken about with such indifference.
"I'm sorry" she murmured, glancing at the woman standing behind her in hasty appraisal.
She seems to be around forty years, hands worn with years of work and green eyes that sparkled with knowledge that spanned over decades.
Her greying hair was tied into a tight little bun, a stray strand winding its way down the side of her face and a hard set mouth with a nose that seemed to be chiseled out of stone.
"I didn't know you were there"
Aeris rushed out her apologies, stomach rumbling at the sight of he pastries, the pangs of hunger momentarily dulling the thud of voices that flushed her skin.
"Please"
She gestured, melting back into the wall to her side.
The women stepped forward with a little humph and the rustle of her skirt before she stopped, right next to her, one hand straying into the little basket by her hip and pulling out a pastry, warm and freshly covered with butter that glistened nestled in the large palm of - who Aeris assumed was - the baker.
"Here" she dumped it into Aeris startled hands, furiously scanning the crowd to make sure no one saw and shaking her head with a flourish "it's for you" her voice was gruff and soft, the sweetness of her actions flowing through her words and brightening the smile that shyly creeped onto Aeris face. "Don't tell my boy, darling," she continued, "he doesn't like me giving things for free"
Oh
Realisation flooded Aeris's mind, a bright flush crossing her cheeks at the thought of not having done anything earlier.
"oh no please!" Immediately she reached for her pouch, pulling out two silver coins and holding it out for the kind woman to take, averting her eyes as the lady scoffed in outrage. "Really?"
"Oh is it for more?" Another two silvers.
Instead of taking it, the lady took her hand, enclosing the fist around the money and lifting Aeris's chin to look her in her eyes.
"What do you take me for?"
She demanded, eyebrows curving with distaste.
"I'm not taking anything from you, we ladies just stick together and I haven't seen you before, enjoy the treat and be on with your day, consider it a treat!"
"But I can't -"
"You can and you will, this kingdom is not so forgiving"
She cut her off with a wave of her hand, clicking her heels lightly,
"and I will not argue any further, and now if you'll excuse me-"
With one final push of her basket and a smile at the dumbfounded girl standing there, she left, short legs flattering loudly as customers followed her towards the counters, purses open and ready to pay.
And Aeris stared at the pastry, picking at its stuffing delicately before pushing a price into her mouth and smiling before pushing away from the surroundings of the little inn and its peculiar workers and onto the packed streets of what had once been her city.
☾ ☾ ☾
ČTEŠ
Treasure | Ateez
Fanfikce❝ It is a dangerous thing, pretence. A man ought to know what he is, even though he is not proud of it❞ She was a storm seeking solace. He was the sun seeking a hearth. And together, they reigned.
