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CODE BLUE
023. LOSING MY RELIGION
episode 27, season 2 & episode 1 of season 3
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IT WAS ALMOST FOUR IN THE MORNING WHEN ADDISON WALKED IN. She had been waiting by her door all night, hoping that her husband would walk out at some point. When he didn't, she walked in.
He was holding her hand, his forehead resting on top of their intertwined hands.
"How's she doing?" Addison asked.
Derek startled. When he looked at her, she noticed he had been crying.
"She's stable," he said, his voice hoarse. "Surgery was hell but they fixed her."
"But she hasn't woken up," Addison didn't ask. He wouldn't have been looking like that if she had woken up. He nodded, and she said, "She will."
Derek just nodded again, feeling numb.
"We are Hughes and Joanna?"
"I made Joanna eat something. She's currently pretending to be asleep with Christopher in the on-call room, but I'm a thousand percent sure that the I.C.U. nurses keep updating them every fifteen minutes."
"I don't want to pretend anymore," Addison confessed. "I can't keep doing this. We are just hurting each other at this point. You love her. And god, I wanted to hate her. I wanted to hate her more than anything in the world. But ever since I operated on Joanna, I knew it would be impossible. She took my cruelty with grace, and she held her head up high. She was the bigger woman, and now I'm being the bigger woman."
Derek didn't have it in him to say anything, so she carried on. "I'll get my lawyer to reach yours."
"You can have everything," Derek said. "Everything is yours. The house in the Hamptons, the house in Manhattan, and whatever else you want."
"But I can't, can I?" Addison said, a single tear streaming down her cheek.
"I'm sorry," Derek muttered.
"I'm sorry too," she replied, walking towards the door. "Derek, one more thing... Be happy."
He smiled at her. "You too."
When she finally walked outside, Emily opened her eyes.
"Em?" Derek asked, the tears coming back. "You were shot. Christopher operated on you. You had-"
"You love me," she muttered.
Derek let out a shaky laugh. "I love you."
She squeezed his hand a little harder, and he asked, "You heard everything, didn't you?"
