What's happening fellas? Especially y'all newcomers who have become attached to the story in the last few months. Holy heck, it's been like what, 5 months? Give or take. Idk I can't count.
Whatever, bottom line is: "Bi-weekly chapters" my sweet 3PO ass right?
Ok, I've got some serious explaining to do, (sorry kids, no chapter just yet) I've left y'all in the dust for long enough, I'm sorry for that. I was actually planning on doing an update when I was sure I was a day away from finishing the next chapter, but Lordi-Leu, I confess that I have no earthly idea when that will be. And just yesterday, a first gen reader of this story who's been here since the early days reached out for a word on what I was doing (thanks bro, I didn't need a reminder that this story exists, but I REALLY needed a reminder that people are interested and waiting for it to continue, wanting to see how it unfolds) and I decided I just couldn't leave y'all hanging anymore at least without a word on progress and process.
Basically, this all started around the middle of last summer when I wrote the last chapter and ended it with that voting gimmick. Despite my thoughts that summer would be more carefree and allow me more time for this story, I ended up having to get a summer job AND do some summer college courses AND work on transferring among other irrelevant duties that hindered my freedom. Despite that, I tried my best to make time for this story and kept my passion high, I promise you.
That was why I was still enthusiastic about that choose-your-path gimmick that I introduced in the last chapter, which was why I put it in that chapter, trying to make it at the perfect time, during a week that coursework was about to let down, I was relying on letting people vote for just a week when last assignments and projects were due so that next week when all I had to do was study for finals, I would have a lighter load and be able to get the next chapter out.
The issue was introduced when, and I'm not condemning anyone but... not a single person voted that week. I had to start making those shitposts that were half memes, half me trying to push more people to choose an outcome. I thought more people would be enthusiastic about this so maybe it was my fault, but when the whole week went by and nobody voted, my scheduled plan just completely collapsed. I had to push writing the next chapter into the time that I was working on final projects to give readers more time to vote (which was hell to juggle when the time to write finally came).
I won't bore you with any more details except for that when I finally started working on the chapter, the summer was coming to a close, had to do some traveling, had to do some register and transfer work along with my job, and in simplified terms, several things led to some others, and before I knew it I was overcome with tasks. Rest assured I tried as long as I could to keep writing this story a recurring part of my life and I still am. Unfortunately at some point in the last two or so months, when the chapter was almost halfway finished, I had to just put it down and was not able to pick it up with more important things grabbing my attention.
Make no mistake, I've still been thinking about this story Every day and occasionally I still come back to this site to read it for myself or check for errors when I have a few minutes. This narrative is still a deep passion that I want to put more love into, but when I slowly started writing less and less every day until I just... stopped, I won't lie, I kind of became desensitized to slacking off and neglecting it. I'm sorry for that. One thing just led to another and before I knew it, writing this story had gone from the front of my priorities to the back of the bus just like that.
What's even worse and what I hate myself for even more was that we were no more than ONE CHAPTER, one or two, (ok it's actually two) away from a really big turning point in the series, a point that I had been thinking about for so damn long, and I'm sure you all were looking forward to it as well. I never wanted to reveal it because I hate spoilers no matter how small or obvious they are, but I really want y'all to have something to look forward to right now, since I haven't given y'all anything to look forward to in months, plus, I think it's kind of obvious: You we're about to finally cross paths and meet up with the Jedi, you were going to finally see the pack, Master Plo... Ahsoka. If there was EVER a worse time to burn out, it was then, because you'd have seen the reunion of a lifetime by now. I'm a little pissed off at myself cause I've been envisioning this event ever since I started writing and I've been excited to reach it, only to run low on steam right at the finish line. I put in so much effort to build it up only to cuck MYSELF and all of you from it. What's gonna happen to them? To you? How will you react? How will they react? Will you remember?? Will they accept you?? Will they welcome you back with open arms? Will an embrace by your master and childhood friend calm your anger? Will you return to how you were? Will you finally find peace with old loved ones?? Will you do something you'll regret?? Will you let anger keep taking hold of your mind?? Will you let your quest for vengeance overshadow the dormant warmth you have toward these people?? Will you be able to see the bigger picture?? Will you spill innocent and friendly blood once again or embrace the faces of your old life??? And what about the event in the past???How will having to condemn one of your only friends to die affect your path in the present???
Only I know, and if you want to find out the answers to these questions, you'll have to wait until.., um, eventually.
Look, I love y'all, and even though I can't make any promises (probably... ever at my current track record) I have the good news that this semester got off to an iffy start but is now starting to get on something vaguely resembling a track. I need to get my sleep schedule in order, I have some grades to bring back up, and I've also been working on an unrelated media project that is recurring and that I'm also passionate about (I'm not gonna bring it up here but it's kind of time consuming), and I need to make myself more disciplined. But alongside all that (and also perhaps, through all that), I'm trying to get back at attacking this story on a regular and recurring basis. I'm currently writing this update at almost 1:00 in the morning on my phone in bed (so forgive me if I was too tired to notice some spelling errors) because I just couldn't sleep knowing y'all were still hanging. And I had to abandon the dramatic return in favor of letting you know I'm going to try this week to get as much of the chapter done as I can, I've been waiting for this turning plot point for so long and I still refuse to let this story die ever, cause I've got so many more twists and turns up my sleeve.
And on a small note: one of the other things that's been keeping me up is I mentioned I've had to rethink some future events in the story when I decided to incorporate a big legends concept into the story that would affect a some big plot points and outcomes.
That being said, the bi-weekly chapter release promise can go f_ck itself in its thicc, dense, singularity-tight a_s. I would love to be able to get back to that kind of schedule but at the moment, I don't know if I can do that, I doubt I can, and I FOR SURE don't want to make a promise I can't break anymore. The schedule is going to be loose af for the next couple of... f_ck I don't know, months maybe. A chapter release schedule is just currently not something I hold the power to maintain responsibly.
Just bet your asses, I'm thinking about this story every day, building it up in my head, running through events and chapters past... and future, constantly, to develop it in my mind and every time I do, I'm craving the day I can once again find the commitment to put it on paper (or google doc) for everyone on wattpad to see in a consistent time frame. That time may not be now or in the foreseeable future, but maybe soon I can start bringing it out to y'all in an inconsistent time frame, which is better than nothing.
With that, I hope I've given y'all some enlightening insight. Sorry for those of you who expected the next chapter, or some more info on the next chapter, or more info on the story, or a time table for when it would come out, or something else after all this time. I know it's pretty lame for me to come in with just a casual check in and nothing else but hopefully that'll change soon. Good night and God bless to you all. Words of encouragement are appreciated. I never realized it until that guy posted on my account conversations tab just yesterday, but any and all comments remind me that y'all wanna see this unfold as much as I do. So leave some encouragement, talk about what you like about the story, what characters interest you and why you want to see their story, or any cool stuff from start wars legends. With my current workload still pretty big on my back, I could really use some talk from y'all to remind me that you're still here and waiting, and hopefully when I h ave a moment to breathe from my responsibilities, it'll encourage me to take up the enjoyment of writing again. Because this story is not just a responsibility, at least not to me. Writing out this narrative as immersive and fleshed out as possible and exploring these characters that I love... it's a privilege and a passion.
So I'll catch y'all later with a meme or another update something. Peace ✌️
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Star Wars: Advent of The Hellwalker (Ahsoka x M! Reader)
FanfictionYou are the Doom Slayer, the bane of hell itself. You live only for the suffering of the restless damned, it's all you've ever remembered. But long ago there was a time when you were simpler, a time when you were a more civilized warrior: a Jedi pad...
