13: Emptiness

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LEO

As soon as we stepped into the room, Anay dropped onto the bed, clearly tired from the day.

"I'm exhausted," she groaned. I laughed at her and headed towards my wardrobe.

Grabbing my clothes, I entered the bathroom and hung them up. While doing so, I caught sight of myself in the mirror, and I paused, staring at my reflection.

My hand slowly moved to my lips. As I touched them, an overwhelming sensation washed over me, as if Alex's kiss was still lingering there, his lips pressed against mine.

My eyes closed involuntarily, and I got lost in the memory. His kiss, his touch, the way he moaned in response to me, and the way he made me feel.

My breath hitched suddenly, and my hands began to run over my body. It was as if Alex's touch was still present, igniting a fiery heat within me. My body grew warm, my dick tightened painfully under my jeans.

I hastily unbuttoned my jeans, allowing it to fall to the floor along with my boxer briefs. My dick became erect.

"Ahmmm," I uttered, gradually sliding my hand up and down the shaft, which aroused me.

The action was quite effective.

As my excitement grew, I began moving my hand more rapidly, feeling my dick enlarge within my grip. It was nearing its full length.

This wasn't the first time I had pleasured myself while fantasizing about Alex.

Since our first make-out, he had occupied my thoughts, and I found myself frequently engaging in self-pleasure.

The entire week had been a challenging one for me, and now, as he kissed me again, it became increasingly difficult to maintain self-control.

"Leo, your phone is ringing," suddenly Anay's voice snapped me out of my pleasure.

I opened my eyes and glanced at the door. Quickly, I locked it, knowing Anay's casual behavior.

Anay was the type to barge in without a second thought.

"Who is it? Answer it," I replied, trying to regain my composure. I took a deep breath and headed for the shower.

After I finished showering and returned to the room, Anay was engrossed in her phone.

"Go and take a shower," I suggested. She responded lazily, "No, I'm feeling lazy."

"At least change your clothes," I insisted, grabbing a set of her clothes from the wardrobe and tossing them at her.

She sighed before picking up her clothes and began changing while sitting on the bed.

"At least change in the bathroom," I frowned, trying to maintain some sense of privacy.

"Why bother going to the bathroom? It's not like you haven't seen my body before," she said with a playful smile, tossing her bra at me, which landed on my chest. She giggled at her own antics.

I sighed, feeling a sense of helplessness. Anay had always been like this, carefree and comfortable around me.

Our relationship was unique; we were more than friends, yet not a couple. We had known each other for so long that nothing felt awkward between us.

We'd seen each other naked countless times due to our habit of barging into the shower when the other was in there.

We had a distinct bond - not based on attraction, but a deep understanding and care for one another. We were like life partners, willing to go to great lengths for each other.

I had promised her parents that I would take care of her for my entire life.

Once, when my mother was gravely ill and needed surgery, we didn't have the money. Anay begged her parents to fund my mother's surgery. I couldn't repay them, so they asked me to always be with her and protect her.

Anay's family was one of the wealthiest in the country, which made her safety a constant concern. I had promised them I would protect her until she found someone who could guard her like a shadow.

"Collect your clothes, don't leave them scattered," I said as I began picking up her clothes that were strewn around.

"Don't scold me today, it's my birthday," she replied, slipping under the blanket. I placed all the clothes in the laundry basket.

"I'm not scolding you. I'm just worried about what you would do if one day I'm not around," I said as I got under the blanket beside her.

She laughed at my words and said, "You won't, I know that, because I won't give you permission to leave me." She moved closer, cuddling in my arms.

I wrapped my arms around her and placed a kiss on her hair.

"Of course. I don't want to meet my end at your hand," I joked, but the laughter was only in my voice. My face remained expressionless.

I rested my head above hers to conceal my face. I didn't want her to see my emotions.

She didn't know that she was the only reason for me to keep going, as she was my responsibility that I had to fulfill even while I was dying inside.

Sometimes, I fear that I'll disappoint her, leaving her behind alone without fulfilling my promise. I have no expectations from this life; I have only one wish: to vanish from this world.

I yearn to go somewhere far, a place from which I wouldn't have to return. After a while, as I felt Anay's steady breath, I gently placed her on the bed and stepped out to the balcony with a cigarette and my mobile in hand.

As I lit the cigarette and placed it between my lips, thoughts of Alex suddenly crossed my mind. But I quickly pushed him out of my thoughts.

I exhaled his thoughts with the cigarette smoke and glanced at my mobile. I checked who had called me while I was in the bathroom.

A wave of emptiness and anxiety washed over me as I saw the caller ID on my mobile. I pocketed my mobile and exhaled the cigarette smoke.

The smoke wafted through the air, carrying away my remaining emotions. Living with a smile on my face and a dying heart is incredibly challenging.

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