Broken Together

Chapter Thirteen: Please

~Aurora~

I can feel Xavier enter the room without needing to look. I can feel the air change as I shift in my spot on the window seal. 

He closes the door behind him and walks towards me. He sits on the window seal beside me. His closeness brings me both comfort and anxiety. I know what is about to happen before he even says a word. He knows I am hiding something from him. My reaction to our kiss earlier probably concerned him.

"Rory." He says.

I let my eyes find his.

I can not help myself from releasing a tear from my eye. I am trying to be strong in this moment for him but it is hard.

I move my gaze from him to the window. The words feel like a knot in my throat.

"Dammit Aurora, talk to me. You're hiding something, I know it. Mates don't keep secrets from each other. It is physically hurting me to know you don't trust me enough to tell me.

My eyes go to his in an instant. He thinks I don't trust him? Is he right? No, I trust him, I do. I just don't want to lose him or cause him more hurt.

"I-I do trust you," I say. My arms are wrapped around my legs.

"Then why won't you just talk to me? I'm right here baby, I'm not going anywhere. I just want to make you happy. I want to see you smile. I want to kiss my mate, hold my mate, and comfort my mate. Just-talk to me. It's fucking killing me to see you are hurting and not know why or how I can fix it. " He says, almost sounding out of breath from trying to keep his emotions under control. 

I look up into his eyes, and I know that I need to tell him.

I shift in my seat to face him more.

"I-I want those things w-with you Xavier. I am just afraid to l-let myself have them when you don't kn-know...." I feel the tears running down my face but I can not stop now. "I want you t-to see me as enough. I want t-to kiss you and not feel...not feel...used."

His eyes never leave mine. I watch as he plays over what I have said in my head. As if it made him more confused.

"Used...Baby, what do you mean?" His voice broke as he got the words out. It's because he already knows.

"T-tom he...he-" I take in a deep breath and focus my thoughts. It will be okay, I tell myself. It will be okay, you can do this. "T-tom raped me."

Immediately I feel this weight come off of my shoulders. It's like taking my first breath of life.

As I look at Xavier, a wave of emotions consumes me. Sadness, Devastation, Rage.

He stands up, combing his hair with his fingers, pulling at it before picking up a chair and throwing it across the room. I watch it shatter to pieces.

"Fuck! IM GONNA FUCKING KILL HIM!" He growls out. "I should have been there to protect you! It's my fault, I didn't fucking protect you!" He slams his fist into the wall creating a huge hole.

Against my instinct to curl into a ball, I stand up and reach for Xavier.

When My hand lands on his arm he instantly begins to calm down. Before I can blink he pulls me to him, holding me very close. He sits on the bed with me in his arms not letting me go.

His head is buried in my neck. The memory of him marking me scares me, but I need to trust he will not do it again until I am ready.

"I can't let you go, I can't, don't ask me to, fuck, just stay right here. Please Aurora." It had shattered him. Finding out what happened had hurt him beyond belief. He is holding me impossibly close but I am okay with that.

"Y-you still want me?" I ask. Already knowing the answer. I just need some reassurance.