23:43🥀
The only thing stopping me from bolting out of the door is Mkhulu. I'm stuck on the sofa, explaining my lightbulb moment in forced detail but he's still not getting it.
Stress lines appear on his face as he tries to make sense of my insanity.
“Wait.Wait. Wait.” Mkhulu says, holding up his hands. “ Just because the movie brought your grandmother and I together in some sort of way doesn't mean I'm letting you take advice from a really bad, questionable romcom.”
“It's not the movie Mkhulu,” I'm exasperated, my legs bouncing, not able to stay still. “—Okay maybe it is the movie but it's also Lisa, and Olivia's last words and God.”
“Oh don't be dramatic.” Mkhulu cuts in,” Let's sleep on this, shall we? And tomorrow if you still feel like doing some spontaneous romantic gesture, be my guest.”
“Mkhulu.” My voice is desperate, the pleading clear.
He holds my gaze, serious. “Leonardo I understand but—”
“No Mkhulu. I don't think you understand. Not completely. I thought it was over. I thought there was nothing left for me to do but accept that one of the best things that's ever happened to me is not…for me. That no matter how much I tried, prayed and fought…I was never going to have her… I don't think you understand how hard it's been envisioning my future without her.Since she's stepped into my life…she always had a place in my tomorrow. So much so that the days feel incomplete without her. I'm left wondering at the end of days with this feeling like something should have happened.”
Mkhulu holds my shoulders, gaze steadied, warm. His voice reaches my ears, comforting. “I completely understand you Leonardo.”
“In fact. I want you and Olivia to be together almost as much as you do but it's late. We shouldn't do things in haste. Maybe you should sleep on this. Let's not do something crazy.”
His words frustrate me, sizzling my racing heart. Meanwhile Olivia's last words continue to echo at the back of my mind, persistent and powerful.
'Lot's of things have been said and done, Leonardo.At the end of this, I guess we'll see…'
Olivia was right, this whole year a lot has been done, I watched and loved and knew her from afar. Then in a short span of time everything became real, became raw and intimate. But it was high school, an era of all things fake and temporary. Only true relationships would stand, only the ones that were genuine, that were godsent would remain.
Olivia was beckoning me that if I truly loved her then she would see in the end. She would see when it was all over.
I don't have to accept anything! I don't have to accept defeat. I need to go to her, to tell her that I still love her and that I'm staying.
I've wasted so much time already. Mkhulu's still looking at me with patient, worrisome eyes. His hold on my shoulders is strong but gentle.
“What's the craziest thing you've done for Gogo?”
Mkhulu's eyes hold mine, honest. There's probably too many to count, that's the answer I see in his eyes.
“Just this once. Let me do a crazy thing for Olivia. Let me try, just one more time. If it fails…” I can't even finish that sentence, my throat clogs. “—It fails. But there's a chance. This one in a million chance that this crazy thing will work.”
Mkhulu wavers, his jaw ticking, his walls cracking. I watch him, battling with himself.
He's thinking realistically, he's thinking like a parent. He's thinking with the possibilities of heartbreak in mind but I need all that to stop.
YOU ARE READING
36 Questions to Fall in Love...in 36 days!
Romance" Olivia, I liked you from the moment you hiccuped your way into my life. It's funny really but it's the truth. I also wasted a lot of time and this is me trying to fix things. I'm asking you to give me 36 days to show my love for you and for you to...
