Today, Melanie was over and Scott called and said, "Guess who's over my house? Nathan!" I said, "Hey, why don't you guys come over here?" So they did.
We went in the backyard and Melanie and I sat on the steps of my deck, eating gummy worms. Nathan and Scott were beating each other up in the yard for fun. Nathan started playing soccer by himself so Scott came over and sat next to me.
He said, "Would you ever kiss Nathan?" I said, "I don't know. Why?" He said, "Well, Nathan told me to ask you." I said, "He did?" He said, "No, not really. [Psych!] But will you?" I said, "I don't know."
Then we went out to the front yard. Melanie and I were sitting on the front steps and Nathan and Scott were sitting sometimes on the lawn facing us and sometimes on the steps with us.
Nathan had left his tennis shoes in the backyard, so he went to go get them. Scott sat back down next to me and said, "Would you ever kiss Nathan?" I sighed, "I told you - I don't know!" He said, "Okay, okay." [Scott needed to brainstorm some better conversation starters.]
Then my mom came home. I guess she was in a good mood, because she offered to drive both of them home instead of having them walk, and then took me and Melanie to the club to go swimming.
Nathan called around 6:15pm and said, "Hi. Um, what did Scott ask you?" I said, "He asked me a lot of things." He said, "Well, when... you know, when I was behind the house getting my tennis shoes, did he ask you something?" "Well, yeah." "What did he ask you?"
Then (thank goodness!) my mom told me I had to get off the phone. I said, "I have to go."
I like my relationship with Nathan more than I liked my relationship with Zach. With Zach, it was all about making out. Whenever we were alone together, he'd be like, "Wanna make out?" But with Nathan, he's more like my really good friend, rather than my boyfriend. I'm afraid that kissing him would ruin it. But I do love him deeply, just not physically. [Ouch. I hope Nathan has never had to hear those words aloud.]
YOU ARE READING
The UnSlut Project
Non-FictionI was the 6th-grade "slut." And I kept a diary. So I decided to create The UnSlut Project in the hopes that my own diary entries could provide some perspective to girls who currently feel trapped and ashamed. I am publishing these entries one at a...
