The Guilty Regret!

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It was 3 am in the morning. Except for the feebly irritating noise of the old fan, the room was deadly silent.

Amika sat in one corner, with her arms hugging her knees and eyes full of terrorized regret and realisation.

Whereas, I was seated on the bed, with my eyes stuck to her for some sort of expression and my fingertips touching the consecutive fingertips of the other hand.

I couldn't hold it anymore so I blurted - "Speak something for God's sake Amika!"

Her gaze shifted to me. That was her only reply.

Before I could add to my sentence, the room buzzed with the ringtone of her mobile. She didn't seem to realise it as she didn't show any movement so I strolled to the table beside her and fetched her mobile out.

It was an unknown number, I paid a quick glance at her to see if she was in any state to answer it but she wasn't so I recieved it.

"Hello?" I asked giddily.

"I'm speaking from the hospital. Mr. Raj has gained consciousness and he wishes to see you Ms. Amika." A female voice informed me.

"I'll be right there!" I said before hanging up.

"He's concious. He wants to see you. Amika?" I moved close to her.

She crouched herself further and burried her face in her hand. That told me that she wasn't going to the hospital. I patted her shoulder and got up.

After having written the address of the hospital, I hired a cab.

I could feel something unusual. That posture wasn't like Amika. She seemed to regret. And apart from that I thought that Raj was the only uninformed member of that whole play.

He had to be told everything, it would help him heal, maybe, physically as well as mentally.

It was time!

~^~

"Lead the way please!" I politely asked the ward boy to direct me to Raj's room.

The passage was dimly lit, creating the right atmosphere for the suffering and dying people.

"Thank you so much!" The ward boy smiled as a reply and left.

It wasn't any different from the general Hospital rooms. The beeping of the monitor, the strong smell of spirit and few small tubes running across the patient's bed.

"Ms. Mira?" Raj recognized me and tried to push himself into a sitting posture.

"Please don't bother yourself." I said but he still accomplished his posture.

"Well..." Raj sighed.

His forehead was wrapped in a thin netted white bandage with a big blood red blot to the extreme right. He was bruised in some places and had a fracture in his left hand.

"Pretty bad huh?" I asked.

"Not really! Nothing compared to the former wounds." He said as he patted his heart.

I took a seat beside him.

"Why did you do all this?" I asked sincerely.

"Ms. Mira. No offence but you have no clue...-."  He started but, " - I know everything about you. Infact a little more than you know yourself."

he glared at me. His eyebrows took a fishhook turn which was a question to me- 'What?'

"Well, I can't really tell you everything at this stage but I can calm your curiosity by saying that.... I've read your girlfriend's, I mean Megha's diary!" I admitted.

He winced at Megha's name.

I reached for his hand and gave it a small squeez.

"You'll have to learn a lot. You have no clue about what awaits you, you're miles away from the truth. And I can't tell you without your doctor's consent. I'm saying this now because what you did is a big.... -"

"Cowardice?" He asked.

"Yeah!"  I stated.

"Well if you claim that you know me enough or even more than that then you should know that my actions were totally reasonable."  He tried to defend himself.

"You won't think this way if you knew the truth!" I said.

He seemed to be surprised.

"Then I'll like to know it!" He said.

"I'm sorry Raj, it needs a bit of waiting. Earliest in the morning, if the doctors arrive on time." I said.

"I don't care about them. They won't decide what I'm supposed to do, they've done their job. I need to know."  He demanded.

"I'm afraid that cannot happen!" I said and crossed my arms.

"Please ok? I need to know. You shouldn't have made me curious if satisfying it wasn't your intention." He snapped.

"I've attained my intention Raj. Now I know that you wouldn't dare to stop your beating heart before knowing everything!"  I mentally smirked at him.

He laid back in his bed in defeat.

"Atleast tell me where is Amika?" He asked.

I had to lie- "She was tired so I didn't wake her up. I'm sure she'll see you in the morning." I said. 'And you'll kick her out!'- My brain added.

~^~ 3

I reached home and slammed against the bed. I didn't even notice Amika sitting in her former place, I was very tired and my senses had given in to sleep.

I woke up when I heard the door unlock. I searched the room for any sign of Amika but I couldn't find her.

I stormed to the hall where I saw the maid just enter. "How is Raj sir? Where's Amika Didi?" She asked innocently.

"He's fine!" I answered what I knew. The latter one, even I wanted to know.

"Would you like tea or coffee?" She asked generously.

I denied both of them.

Just then I spotted a letter. To Mira! It was addressed to me.

A bitter realisation sunk in, was it Amika's?

I took lazy steps towards it. By now my sytem had got immune to get surprised at Veer's Laptop screen and ready to shed tears at sight of any written piece. Let it be Megha's diary, Rohit's 'Sorry' envelope, Raj's dying note or Amika's letter.

I gripped it in between my fingers and unfolded it.

My worst fears had come true, it was her who'd written it. I could have guessed it last night when words won't dare to come out of her mouth, she'd let the ink spread on that letter.

She'd run away from everything.

I read intently....

~^~

"Hello? Rohit?"

"Yea Mira, everything fine?"

"I need you to do me a favour!" 

"Anything!" 

"You'll have to tell Megha about Raj. We were right."

"But......-"

"-No buts Rohit. Tell her everything, this is the right time and bring her here. Get Neha too. I'm waiting. Okay!?"

Silence.......

"Before sunset! Wait for us."

~^~

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