Chapter 26

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I just finished a stupid assignment on volleyball and it 1:35am so I thought that I should reward myself by rewarding you. Have an update!

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Vic's POV

I sigh softly to myself as I drive back towards home. College was a bust. Maybe I'll try again next year. Or maybe I'll just be a college dropout forever. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't study, I couldn't concentrate in class, I didn't get any assignments done and my roommate hated me. Why? Because of Kellin Quinn Bostwick. He was on my mind constantly. When I was in class, all I was doing was thinking about him. When I was studying, I was thinking about him. When I was supposed to be sleeping, I was thinking about him. There wasn't a minute in the day when he wasn't on my mind. I got so sleep deprived that I'd pass out. It was horrible. Now I understand why Mike didn't want me to go. Heck, my roommate even got sick of me. He said I was too sad.

At first, I was angry at Kellin all over again because he was always on my mind, making me into this person and I for some reason thought that it was his fault. But then as the days turned into weeks, I realized that I just really fucking miss him. I knew this feeling wasn't going to leave anytime soon and I couldn't go through college like that so I just dropped out. But now, I'm back at square one. No Kellin; no happiness; no meaning.

Having gone to college in LA, I still have another two or so hours to go until I get home. That's a lot of time alone, to think, just like how I used to think back before I had met Kellin. It makes it worse because today is Valentine's Day. The day to express your love to that special someone and the day I first laid eyes on Kellin Quinn. It's been an entire year. So much has happened and just like I was at this time last year, I'm miserable. It's like nothing has changed at all yet I know that everything has.

I try to get Kellin off of my mind for a bit just thinking about seeing Mike again and how disappointed he's going to be in me because I dropped out. It works for a little bit but then my thoughts come full circle and I find myself thinking about Kellin again.

Part of me wishes that I had never met him but I know that if I had never met him then I wouldn't be who I am today. He brought me happiness but sadly he also took it away.

I decide to turn the radio on to distract myself. Then I hear his voice. I shake my head. God I must be really sleep deprived. But then I realise it's coming from the radio.

"We're live from backstage with Kellin Quinn, the singer of Sleeping With Sirens. We just played With Ears To See and Eyes To Hear off of their new acoustic EP, If You Were a Movie, This Would Be Your Soundtrack. Kellin, can you tell us what that song was about and why you wrote it?" The radio presenter asks and I listen intently. I didn't know they brought out new music.

"Um, yeah." It's almost like he's sitting next to me as he speaks. "Most people think that it was about someone who screwed me over."

"Well that's what it sounds like. The lyrics are 'so tell me how does it feel, how does it feel to be like you, I think your mouth should be quiet 'cause it never tells the truth'." The radio presenter says.

My stomach clenches. Is this about me? Or did someone else hurt him? I'm so confused.

"The lyrics are more directed at myself." He says and I raise my eyebrows surprised. "I didn't so much as lie but more kept something from someone I loved very much. The songs about being angry with myself."

Hearing him talking about being angry at himself makes me feel unbelievably guilty. He shouldn't feel that way. I'm the one that should be angry with myself not him.

"Well now we know." The presenter says. "Next up is the fourth track from the EP; Don't You Ever Forget About Me."

Music starts playing and I listen intently.

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