Chapter 1~For you.

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Alrighty Wattpad thanks so much for all the comments and feedback here is the first chapter :D hope you all like it and tell me who is ur fav. chara. Jackson or Andrew? or maybe even Kristy.  Tell me if it's too long.

-G.C

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The very next morning I was up early hiding anything that my father or mother might find in my room. It’s the weekly room check. I know how silly this is being seventeen and your parents still check to make sure your room is clean. I crawled under my bed and pulled out the journal I kept. I hid it from my parents it was the only thing that knew I was gay and planed on living my life the way I wanted. Taking my lucky pen that Kristy gave me last year I wrote:

 Dear Lord,

Because love is patient: Help me to be slow to judge, but quick to listen, hesitant to criticize, but eager to encourage, remembering your endless patience with me.

Because love is kind: Help my words to be gentle and my actions to be thoughtful. Remind me to smile and to say "Please" and "Thank You" because those little things still mean so much.

Because love does not envy or boast, and it is not proud: Help me have a heart that is humble and sees the good in others. May I celebrate and appreciate all that I have and all that I am, as well as doing the same for those around me.

Because love is not rude or self-seeking: Help me to speak words that are easy on the ear and on the heart. When I'm tempted to get wrapped up in my own little world, remind me there's a great big world out there full of needs and hurts.

Because love is not easily angered and keeps no record of wrongs: Help me to forgive others as you have forgiven me. When I want to hold onto a grudge, gently help me release it so I can reach out with a hand of love instead.

Because love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth: Help me stand up for what is right and good. May I defend the defenseless, and help the helpless. Show me how I can make a difference.

Because love always protects and always trusts: Help me to be a refuge for those around me. When the world outside is harsh and cold, may my heart be a place of acceptance and warmth.

Finally, because love always perseveres: Help my heart continually beat with love for you and Jackson. Amen.

Xoxox Andrew~

Of course I knew the big guy himself wouldn’t ever get to read this but in my heart it was the only way I could keep from going crazy.

Winter two years ago. I nearly succeeded in killing myself only Kristy knows this she was the one who saved me.

“Andrew. Come on don’t die on me.”

I could feel ice on my skin and someone forcing their fingers down my throat. Throwing up was the easy part surviving Kristy’s wrath was the hardest.

“Andrew. Why would you try to kill yourself?”

“If you were me you’d understand.”

I left her with that explanation and we swore we’d take it to our graves. It was officially sunrise and my father’s footsteps came down the hall. He stopped at my room and knocked.

“Andrew you up?”

“Yes. Sir.”

“Alright. Just checking you know you have a big clean up job at the church Jackson will meet you there shortly.”

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