Chapter 9~ Pick up the pieces and Just go

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Jenny and Jackson hung out more than ever as I sat and drank my life away. I could no longer use my hand and depended on Jackson for everything.

"Andrew?"

Jackson came to my side and pulled the glass of whiskey from my hand.

"Hm?"

"Come on Andrew, you're just sitting here and doing nothing. I know my man is strong."

He tried to kiss me and I just moved away, feeling the bile come up my throat and into my mouth. I turned the other way and just up chucked all over the table.

"Oh geez. Andrew you're a light weight."

"shut up..just leave me alone."

"Come on. You've got to get over this your daddy is a cold hearted man and your mama just left him. You saw it coming and I saw it coming a mile away." he stretched his arms out and sighed before saying he had to take Jenny back to Carol.

Jackson left and I went straight for our bedroom too sleep off the hangover from yesterday. 

~

Dear God,

It's me Andrew. I know the things that have happened to me is your will but could you please give me something to smile about. I feel like i'm falling and your not there to catch me.

~

Once I came back from taking Jenny home to Carol, I found Andrew passed out on the bed and the throw up still all over the table. 

"He could have attempted to clean it up."

Grabbing the dish towl and the trashcan I did my best to clean it up, though the smell still lingered. Finding Andrew still sleeping I crawled on the bed and pulled him over too me. Andrew still wanted to just get it over with, but I decided we should at least get married. 

Oh course no one would want too marry us unless we went too Iowa or something. Thats about eight hours or a so away by car. We didnt really have the best jobs. Andrew worked in a little gas station and I had my job fixing cars all out of the town.

"Andy?"

He was knocked out, I knew he wouldnt want to do "anything" since his hand was all fucked up, but that didnt really stop me from having hour long makeout sessions with him. Andrew didnt want to admit it but he was pretty skilled when it came to pleasing me. That said I closed my eyes and ran my hand through his hair.

~

I woke to find Jackson wrapped around me sleeping, pushing him away he woke up mumbling something in his sleep.

"andy?"

"Yes?"

"you feeling any better?"

I nodded and grabbed my phone off the nightstand seeing that my boss had called five times already.

"Crap. I'm late..Think you could drive me to work?"

"Sure." He mumbled and grabbed his jacket off the floor. Jackson cursed and dragged his feet across the floor.

"If you dont want to take me, i can walk." I said while pulling my shoes on and beating him to the door. Jackson grabbed my arm tight.

"Andrew, you know what I want to do. I want to talk to my boyfriend just have a normal converstion and see him blush at the dirty things i say. I want to just hold you without feeling like a freak."

"Please just let me go."

His grip losened, and I dare not make eye contact with him.

"Andrew?"

I walked through the kitchen and into the living room hallway, grabbing the keys on the table and just  walking out the door. Jackson at my heels he tugged at my arms and tried to pull me back inside the house.

"Andrew you can't drive!"

"Just leave me alone. you dont have to worry about taking care of me anymore."

"What are you talking about?" he stood there with his arms crossed, as I got in the car and started it. I didnt know how to drive I guess it was hold my dad had on me  so i couldnt leave. Leaving was the first thing on my mind.

"Jackson, You've done nothing but take care of me. I have to learn to do things by myself."

"Come on I'll drive you."

"No. Jackson...I think..were done."

"Andrew. do you know what you're saying?"

"Yes. Goodbye Jackson." 

Putting the car in reverse I pulled out of the driveway in a hurry, Jackson not to far from the car. He screamed and hollered as I drove off. I could see him in the distance still running. I turned on the radio to drown out my screaming. 

I just drove until I couldnt see Jackson or home anymore. My life was about to begin without my family or friends.

Dear God,

Watch over Jackson. 

~Andrew

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