HEART SHAPED KISSES ❁ LIL XAN

Twenty Four

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I pick myself off of the tear-stained pillow and walk to the bathroom, right across the hall. I run the cold water and slowly rinse my face, then I dry it with the towel hanging next to me. I look at myself in the mirror. My eyes were still red and puffy.

I walk back into the bedroom and open the drawer. I pull out the jar full of weed and a pack of blunt wraps. I start to grind a bit up to roll it.

Maybe I was over reacting towards Diego. Maybe I just shouldn't have brought anything up about what happened. But, how did he expect me to trust him? He hasn't given me any reason to.

All I know is that I feel like shit.

I finish rolling the blunt and try to find a lighter. I remember that I had one in the pocket of my jeans, which I had left on the ground after unpacking. I pick them up and pull the lighter out. Then, I place the blunt in between my lips and spark it.

I sit down on the bed and try to calm myself down.

The door opens and slams shut, which I can hear through the bedroom. It has only been an hour, so i don't know why Diego would be home so soon. I hear his footsteps coming towards the bedroom.

"Are you ready to talk?" He asks me, quietly.

"You're the one who walked out." I tell him, without any emotion in my words.

Diego sighs and sits down next to me. I take another hit from the blunt, and hand it to him. He gently takes it out of my fingers.

"Im sorry." He says to me, then exhales. "I don't know why I expected you to trust me. I know that Ive fucked up a lot and thats not your fault. I guess Im still just pissed off about what I did and I shouldn't have gotten so mad at you."

He takes another hit before handing it back to me.

"I understand." I tell him. "I shouldn't have been such a bitch to you though." I sigh.

"Don't say that, you had every right to be pissed at me." He says, looking down at his fingers and fidgeting them.

"I want you to go."

"I dont want to make you worried the whole time that Im gone."

"Diego, Im moving on from that. Its a clean slate now, okay? So, that means that this is your chance to prove to me that I can trust you." I tell him and take another hit.

"I love you." He turns his head towards me and looks into my eyes.

"I love you too." I say, a small smile escaping my lips.

We sit in silence for a few minutes, passing the blunt back and forth to each other.

Once it's dead, I reach over and put it in the ashtray. The high immediately hits me when I move.

"Why did you come back so soon?" I ask him.

"From Cole's?"

"Ya."

"Well, I stayed there for a bit but I just felt bad. I was acting like a child, just walking out on you." He explains to me. "I wanted to talk to you."

I nod, letting him know that I understand.

There was a little part of me that couldn't help but worry about him being gone.

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