Echoes of Aphasia

Chapter 11: Heartbreaks And Break Ups

It's been four days since the night Hayden slept over, again. Things seemed to be a lot different between us. He was currently away on some classified business that he, for some reason, did not want to tell me anything about. We've been texting each other endlessly though. Whenever I have a small break, I send him a text and whenever I look at my phone, I see that he's texted me back. Even though we are like 6 hours apart.

So tell me, what looks better on me, dark blue or gray?

Along with the message, he attached two pictures of him wearing two different dress shirts. He looks handsome in both, but the gray makes my knees weak. Laughing at his text, I quickly reply.

Hmm.. I would definitely say gray, it makes your eyes pop out even more than the blue does. You going out tonight?

Well yeah kind of! I met this girl, and I really like her so I thought I'd dress up for her. I’m going to surprise her. I’ve got a whole evening planned out. Think I’ll win her over?

I stare at my phone for a long time without responding to his text. Yes that's right, Hayden us currently single. I don't know what exactly happened but apparently the day after he was with me, they broke up. I'm still with Caden, because I don't think it's appropriate to break up over the phone. Plus, I haven't seen or heard anything from him this week and to be perfectly honest, I didn't try reaching out to him either.

Sitting on my bed, with my phone still clutched in my hand, I think to myself I bet she's really beautiful. Lucky her. I do hope Hayden finds someone who makes him happy, don't get me wrong. I just can't get over the feeling that I wish I could be that person for him like he's that person for me. It'll always be my secret though. I'll never tell him that I have fallen deeply in love with the person he is. Like Rose said in Titanic, a woman's heart is an ocean of secrets. Gathering all the courage I can, I finally text back.

That's great Hayds! I do hope you have a marvellous evening. Just remember to Be yourself that'll do the trick! I know she will fall for you the minute she sees you, and if that doesn’t work, then just flash her your dashing dimples and it will be over with her heart. She’ll be putty in your hands.

And this is why you're my BFF! Thanks AllyBear. I’ll tell all about  it when I get home later on tonight. Enjoy your evening too beautiful Xx

I placed my phone on the night stand next to my and went to my bathroom. Obviously I’m not beautiful enough. I thought to myself bitterly. After a quick bath, I head back to my bedroom however, I'm stopped in my tracks when I hear a knock against my front door. My heart skips a beat and I rush to the door, hoping that maybe Hayden would be there looking all handsome. I quickly open the door with  large smile, but it immediately drops when it reveals Caden instead of the man I love.

“Cade! Long time no see.”

“I agree love, I've missed you so much. You were always on my mind.” before I am able to say anything, he engulfs me into a hug. There's something different about this hug. It almost feels as if we're long lost lovers who had finally been reacquainted again after months. I found myself leaning into his warmth, and just for a second, I tell myself it's not all a lie. He's not cheating on me with my best friend's ex-girlfriend. He gently places his hand in my neck and then he brushes his lips against mine again.

“I have missed these intoxicating kisses so much.” He leans in to deepen the kiss but before he succeeds, I push him away from me and open the door wider for him to enter. Once I've locked the door, I had to the kitchen and prepare him some tea. I have learned that where Hayds is in love with my vanilla plates, Cade loves black tea.

“I want to really apologize to you for what happened between us baby, I was out of line and I really want to change that between us now. I want us to work out and I've realized that being a possessive control freak won't fix us. It will only break us. Also, I really want to apologize for physically hurting you.”