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I was throwing up. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I crept in the back room later that day and I was throwing up. I kept thinking about Yearn. I kept thinking about all those young people who were just shot. Shit had gotten so real now.

"You should do that more quietly."

I turned my back to see Urge standing there. He didn't have a shirt on. He was leaned up against the wall of the bathroom stall. His hands were stretched over him and rested on his head. He stared at me curiously with his constant cool personality. He was so calm and so focused. How could he not be panicking after he saw what we saw.

"I'm sorry if I bothered you."

I was embarrassed. I couldn't stop throwing up though. I let it out in the toilet. Every part of me wanted to tell this boy to get away from me. I didn't want the boy I'd been crushing on this entire time to see me like this. It couldn't have been attractive to be gagging over a toilet in the way that I was doing.

"You don't want the others to look at you as weak."

Was Urge having an actual conversation with me? I was shocked by it. He had gone around ignoring me and pretty much everyone else this entire time but now he was actually having some sort of conversation with me. It was strange to see him standing there talking to me in the way that he was.

"Did you not see what happened out there?"

He nodded, "I saw. No need to sit around and feel sad for them. Look at it this way. Those kids are probably better off than we are."

It was a sad idea that he was saying. He had no sadness behind his eyes though. He seemed cool and collected. If anything the emotion that came to mind was annoyance. He seemed annoyed at this entire situation.

I wondered about Urge. Who was he? Where had he come from? What was his name before this and how had he been kidnapped. He was such a strange and captivating person and I didn't know anything about him.

The only thing I could manage to say to him was a weak, stifled, "I suppose..."

"Good night Desire..."
He knew my name. It was the first time I had heard Urge speak to me. He was short as usual not holding much of a conversation but at the same time I was blown away by him. That was all it took . I wondered if his short conversation was Urge's way of providing some sort of comfort to the situation we were in. It didn't matter though. Nothing mattered.

I was woken up early in the morning. It wasn't by Passion like I usually was though. It wasn't even by a moderator. I was woken up by Lust. She was standing over my cot with slanted eyes. I almost jumped out of bed when I saw her there. My heart beat. I don't know why I got so nervous and so afraid when she stared at me. It was still darkness. The sun was just now rising in the sky.

"Come with me."
I didn't say anything else. I just followed Lust down the hall. I noticed the way she walked as I followed her. She had so much confidence in her walk. We walked outside of the dormitory and into the hallway. There were moderators passing back and forth. They all looked busy. None of them seemed to call into question the idea of Lust walking me through the hallways. It was almost like she had free reign of this place.

Lust took me to a room. It was similar to one of the rooms that I had seen before. A part of me was scared. Would I be beaten? Would I be killed?

Her smile spread across her face. I didn't know if the smile was full of deceit or not.

"Desire."

"Yes ma'am."
"How did you sleep last night?" she asked, "I hoped you slept well. I would understand if you didn't, especially with the deaths. Witnessing death is especially hard for the new recruits. I still remember the first time I saw it. Again...it won't get better, but you'll get used to it."

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