Assassins Desire MxM (Staten Krown)

4

"That's one cold motherfucker man..." Craving stated.

It was the next day after the second test. Passion had an ice pack on my head from where I was hit over the head. Craving was talking about Urge. He was eating a cold deli meat sandwich in the dormitory. Urge on the other side of the room was alone as usual. He was working out. It was strange to see because his leg was probably still injured but he was still managing to do crunches as if 8 abs were not enough.

"I can't believe he just killed Sensuality."

I still remembered it. I still remembered how Urge had stepped behind Sensuality and just snapped his neck. He just snapped his neck like it was nothing. It made me wonder even more who Urge was before this. It made me wonder how he could be so cold.
"He was attacked first," Passion defended him, "It's not like we have a choice here. This is who we have to become..."

"Right...still though..."

"Sensuality would have died anyway. You saw how quick they killed Carnal for failing."

She was right. Craving and I both knew that Passion was right. As soon as Urge and I passed that finishing line the Moderators went over to Carnal and put three bullets in his head. They hadn't even given him a chance to say any final words or beg for his life.

"It's different. The moderators are all brainwashed," I stated shaking my head, "We should still be human. You know? We shouldn't do whatever to survive. He could have knocked Sensuality out or something."

Craving was nodding with me. I knew he understood what I meant. He took a deep bite of his sandwich.

Passion wasn't having it though, "Those sound like the words of a dead man."

She was still probably right. That's the fucked up part of it. I wondered if I could do it. I wondered if I could kill. I knew that I would have to. That is why I was here, but I wondered how it felt. I wondered what Urge was going through. He hadn't stopped working out since he came back. It was almost as though he was more focused now then ever. It was almost like having come so close to losing had made him more desperate then ever.

Passion had walked away. She was heading for the bathroom. I didn't mind not being around her. She was getting colder. I knew I wasn't the only one who was beginning to notice the change in her personality. Craving was still staring over at Urge.

"Do you feel it bro?" he asked me.

"Feel what?"

I had an idea what he meant but for some reason I still asked.

"How Passion is changing? How everyone is changing," Craving stated shaking his head, "Man I'm not trying to turn into a monster. You know. I'm like religious. I don't want to kill no one. I'm not about that life."

I nodded. Craving definitely didn't seem like he was.

"This is our life now."

"I was drafted into the NFL before I was kidnapped. I had it made man. You know how many teams wanted me? It's fucking ridiculous," Craving started shaking turning around, "One day I went out with a bunch of groupies. You know who was in the group. Lust. I thought was she was so fucking attractive. Then I wake up here...I can't even say my fucking name man..."

"This is our life now..."
"Is that all you're going to say Desire?"

I laid back down. I didn't know what he expected me to say. Maybe it was just easier. Maybe it would have just been easier to be like Urge. Maybe Passion had started to figure it out. Not caring was so much easier than caring.

It was a month before our next training began. In the meantime we had been doing reading. I noticed how hard everyone was studying this time as compared to the first time we were handed books. This time we studied the books as though our lives depended on it. The truth was our lives probably did. It was good having Passion and Craving still around. Ardor was even a good study partner when he wasn't busy with Craving. I knew from the contents of the books what we would be learning almost immediately.