Chapter 38 - Shopping Carts and Love Hearts

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Spencer pushed the cart through the deserted aisles of the store.

"Hey! Go slower!" Lilith protested, sitting in the cart. "We're going to miss the snacks..."

"The snacks are at the back of the store!" Spencer replied amusedly.

"Yes! But there are so many cool things to look at here! Look." She let her hand hang out of the cart, and grabbed the first thing in the aisle. "See! Olive oil! Olive oil is crucial."

"Put that back!" he laughed.

Lilith pretended to pout, and placed the bottle back on the shelf.

"Maybe we can even get you a lollipop if you behave well." he joked.

She laughed. Spencer smiled back. He'd missed her laugh.

"Okay, what snacks do you want to get?"

"Hmmm..." the doctor thought for a bit. "Almonds."

"Why do you want almonds?"

"I don't know. I usually have them when I'm stressed, but I've been enjoying them whenever."

"Maybe you have a selenium deficiency, which is associated with fatigue and anxiety. Almonds are a really good source of selenium, so you might have a small addiction to them." She replied without even really thinking, trying to look around for some candy.

Spencer loved how he could always learn something new with Lilith. It was so rare for him to be with someone like her. That could teach him things. He was never bored with her - she could always switch from one subject to another and was always as eager to learn as him. One only knows that they like someone's company when they're in a car with them and they want the ride to last longer. With Lilith, he wanted to go on a never ending road trip.

"Doc?" Lilith asked, seeing he was distracted.

"Uhmm, yeah?" He snapped out of his thoughts.

"Should we get this?" She waved a packet of popcorn in front of her face.

"It's a classic! Throw it in the cart."

Lilith placed the box next to her, increasingly excited for their evening together. Spencer felt the same. For this weird reason, he preferred evenings with her, rather than spending them with Jea-

Spencer's train of thought was interrupted by Lilith, who had stood up in the cart to reach a cereal box on the top shelf. She had lost her balance, and toppled backwards. The doctor's heart skipped a beat. He reached out to catch her in her fall, grabbed her waist, and was pushed onto the floor.

"Are you okay?" Lilith's voice was panicked. Her fall had been softened by Spencer, who'd taken in most of the shock.

"Uhm... yeah, yeah I'm okay." He rubbed his lower back. The doctor gave her a small smile to show her he was okay.

"Oh god... I'm so sorry."

"As long as you're okay, I'm good." He replied, his voice suddenly soft.

"I..." Lilith turned her head to look at him properly. And their gaze was held for a moment. As they realised how they were positioned. She was basically sitting in his lap, and their faces inches away. "Thanks." She finished her sentence. She got up, helped Spencer do the same and dusted her knee socks.

Lilith smiled at him, and looked away. She got back in the cart, without making eye contact. The words had hit her in a way she didn't want him to see. He always said these things, she wondered, but did he ever mean them? Was he more important to her than she was to him? She shook her head, and shuffled back into position in the shopping cart. The young woman didn't want these thoughts to parasite the first good moment she'd had with him in some time.

"This sounds gross, but it might be the idea of the century. We should get the popcorn, and some marshmallows. Then we melt it over the popcorn, and make it super gooey!" She suggested, excited. She had turned, her hands clutching the side of the cart and her chin resting on her knuckles.

"Won't it be...salty?" Spencer pulled a face.

"No! We'd do it with sweet popcorn, you idiot!" She chuckled, her hair moving with each of her laughs.

For the first time, Spencer wished he had a phone at hand, not his old Nokia. Just so he could take a picture of her. Keep it forever. He loved the way her curls framed her laughing face and rosy cheeks, the way she said "idiot". In a way that was loving, more than insulting. An inexplicable feeling, that all the dictionaries he had read couldn't truly define.

"Where are you going, Doc?"

"What?" Spencer snapped out.

"You've been really distracted too, I see. You missed the candy aisle, go back ten meters."

Too? What did she mean?

"Hmmm..." Lilith was thoughtful as Spencer back-pedalled. "Should we take some love hearts?"

"I didn't know they sold it here! Yes, definitely."

Lilith grabbed a pack and looked at it for some time.

"I kind of want to open this..."

Spencer was feeling a bit reckless with her around. "I mean... we are paying for it anyways... might get a taste."

Lilith quickly ripped the packet open, and handed a candy to her friend.

"What does yours say?" Spencer asked.

"To the moon and back. And yours?"

"Love you. A bit more plain."

Love you to the moon and back.

It was silent for a bit. The two didn't comment on the Love Hearts. Lilith popped the candy in her mouth, and continued browsing the shelf.

"So...gummy bears or licorice rolls?"

"Licorice, one hundred per cent."

"I think we might be some of the only people in the country to actually like licorice." She joked.

Spencer laughed. "On second thought, let's take both. And some snickers bars too."

"God! We're already piling up here!" She played around with the food in the cart. "I might have to get out." She got up in the cart, holding onto the side.

"Wowowowow-" Spencer ran to her, worried. "No. Last time you did this, you fell. Here, let me help you."

Lilith didn't protest and lifted her arms a little, so Spencer could lace his around her waist. He locked his hands behind her back and lifted her out of the cart, as she let her arms fall on his back. She'd never really thought about the fact that Spencer was in fact quite strong. He carried her out pretty easily. Well, he was an FBI agent after all. FBI agent. She hadn't really thought about it either. How « cool » that sounded. She knew Spencer was quite a fun person, despite what people might think, but she never really saw the full picture. And her heart hurt at that moment. She realised how he might see her. As only a small part of his life. As his neighbour that he hung out with when he was bored. After all, he had all these fascinating cases to solve. She was merely a few hours in his week. She couldn't help but think: where did all these insecurities come from? She usually didn't think about their friendship so deeply. To her, it was based on trust and honesty. And yet she was scared now, as if she was anxious about how he may see her, despite her wanting to be with him more...

"There you go, milady." He said, as he placed her softly on the ground. Her hands still on his back.

Milady.

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