Terrestrial Alien ✔

Chapter 44: Terrestrial Alien

S e t h

"Tell me." Joshua whispers, leaning close, and I want to kiss him again.

So many emotions well up inside me that it's hard to choose one to stick with: excitement, nervousness, apprehension, hesitation. Am I really going to tell him? After all this time?

Is it going to make any sense to him?

I look into his eyes, searching, and I know I have to tell him.

"I have one condition though." I tell him cautiously.

"What's that?"

"You have to promise not to freak out."

Joshua gives me a skeptical look, like making him agree to this condition is making him grow more uneasy than he would have otherwise. But I really don't want him to freak out.

"I just want to be sure." I add, hoping to prevent him from growing more anxious wondering about it. "Can you promise that?"

He considers it, but since he doesn't know exactly what I'm going to tell him, I suppose it's hard for him to know an answer. Regardless, in the end he agrees.

"I promise." He says.

"Okay." I sigh, relieved. "It'd be easier if I showed you."

Pushing myself up from the carpet, I quickly move over to my pile of textbooks in the corner.

I search through them for the right one—the black one with the shark silhouettes on it—and when I find it, it's already open to the right page. Chapter 12, section 3. The Origin of Life.

"Here." I say breathlessly as I return to Joshua's side, sinking to my knees and placing the book in his lap.

The pages are filled with my own notes: pen and pencil scribbles, red circles and erratic arrows, so many that it's almost impossible to read the original text. From Joshua's surprised expression, I can tell he recognises the textbook from his own biology class, which is exactly where I got it from. So much for returning the books I "borrowed"... Oops. It was for a good cause though!

"What am I supposed to be looking at?" Joshua asks, skimming the notes with steadily growing confusion. He looks to me for an explanation, a translation maybe, and that jumble of emotions returns.

"I... Well, I should explain, but don't know where to start." I fidget with the sleeves of my sweater, skimming the notes myself. All at once, I feel self-conscious about how erratic my notes are, that they're even there at all. What is Joshua going to think of the notes he can read?

"I guess... With the beginning? You came here in a meteor, right? What does this book have to do with that?" Joshua is speaking in a curious, open tone I'm not used to, and I can't decide if it's helping me to feel less nervous or making me feel more nervous.

I let out a slow breath, trying to settle the jitters in my stomach.

"Yes," I answer. "I did come here in a meteor... In a strange sense. The book has to do with it because, well, it's given me a theory as to why I exist."

Joshua blinks, looking up from the pages. "A theory? You mean you don't actually know..."

I shake my head, biting my lip. "No, I don't really know why I exist. Why I'm here or how for that matter. I just... am. And this book gave me some possible answers to the how question at least. Look, here."

I lean in to point out a passage in the textbook and in doing so, I can feel Joshua's closeness like a magnetic field. I can feel him suck in a sharp breath, and I wonder if it's because of me. His gaze is fixed on the passage I'm indicating.