English Rose - Alycia Debnam Carey

Falling

Today signed my first day of my last year in Oxford. Now, the old buildings that I loved even cherished didn't look the same anymore to me. Two years ago, they were my living dream, where I could get easily lost in so many ways. I was thinking, wondering where they would guide me. The second year, the bright walls couldn't look better. They captured her essence, her steps, her fragrance, our story. Today, however, it looked grey, like the vibrance flew away. Nothing looked like I used to see it. It now captured only sorrow and sadness of a broken heart.

During summer, when I went back in Oxford before classes, I went back to my apartment, to tidy and clean the dust that settled during the warm days.
When I unlocked the door, her perfume attacked me, I could almost feel her embrace taking me in. It felt like she could be in my room and appear in a second but nobody was there. Only a memory.
Through the day, I put all the things she left here, both believing we would find them again back from holiday in a box. I took it with me and went to her place. I knew she wasn't here already and I was glad about it to be honest. I went there, a belly ache and left the box on her counter. I looked in my bag for a piece of paper and pen to write her a note.

"Here's all your things that remained at mines. I took back mines too.

Btw, the key I had is under your mat"

Nothing more, nothing less. I left, putting under the mat the key as I wrote and never came back.

•••

I was sitting next to Miles and next to him were Maisie and Harry, still madly in love but desperately trying to hide it and me, nobody on my right, only an empty chair. Since the first day of class this year, I wasn't as focused as I used to be. Maybe I was tired to study, I was getting tired of waiting to enter the real world and start my own life. I found myself escaping more and more through drawing in classes so as right now, I saw sketching random things as Milo was talking to me. He knew I was always listening. I sometimes looked at the auditorium to look at the crowd and wanting to see/not see her. Which happened. I looked at Milo and before glanced at the class when I saw her climbing the stairs. Her hair were a little bit longer, her glasses on, a jumper and a knit skirt on. We both looked at each other for a brief second, her eyes full of hope at first and in a split second showing me the greatest sorrow, before she sat and I went back to my drawing. I felt Milo's hand on my shoulder to show me his support which made me smile. And so the last year has started...

••• 3 years later •••

-Hey honey I'm home!
I said, taking my coat and shoes off. We were in October. It was raining outside in the streets of London, soaking the dead leaves on the concrete.
-I'm in the kitchen!
My smile found its place on my lips as I heard my favorite voice. I made my way to the kitchen, opened on our living room in this small apartment of us under the London's rooftops. It smells horribly good. I placed myself behind my loved one, my arms embracing them.
-What are you cooking?
-Your favorite!
His voice was full of care and love. He then turned around, his head just above mine, taking me in his embrace too. His smile was wide, his eyes happy and so were mine.
-How was your day?
-Good! Better now that I'm here right?
-How were you students?
-Nicer! It gets better everyday, maybe I'll have a chance at the end of the year and some of them will enjoy my presence you know?
I said half sarcastic half true.
-Ohhh come on! I bet they already do but they're too proud to admit it! I mean look at you! Who wouldn't love a teacher like you?
-This isn't the point Alex... But thanks for that! Still appreciate it.
He then pecked my head and went back to his cooking.
-Go to the bathroom, shower and make yourself confortable alright? I'm taking care of you!
-You're an angel!
I went then to the bathroom and wash the day off with the warm water falling on my body. Steam started to spread in the whole room as I relaxed even more when I heard a shy knock at the door.
-Darling? Dinners ready.
-Alright I'll be there in 5 minutes!
I then stopped everything and dried myself and put a big jumper I took from him. I went out with my hair wet, make up off, I could finally rest.
-You have no idea how much I love when you're planning everything!
-Believe me I do, you remind me everyme.
He said with a chuckle.
-It's because I'm grateful! Not many couples share tasks like this! Or even care that much of the other you know?
I said while sitting at the table, dinner in front of me and soft music playing while the candle lights were playing on the walls.

I couldn't be more grateful than that! The most amazing person was in front of me, looking at me everyday with the same loving eyes, my studied over with success, a job that I loved a lot, a nice flat in the capital. What else could I ask for? My life evolved so well! Just as I wanted. Maybe I just thought for a time that I would spend it with another person but well... Time isn't predictable. I'm good now, very good! And nothing could change this strong and successful life I'm living right now.

_______________________________________

Helloooooooo!!!

Wow it's been such a looooong time! I don't even dare to look the date of the last update... But school this year is a hell of a race! I don't have time for anything else, really!

But as you know, we're all remaining at home here in France and now I have to time to catch up with the things I couldn't do anymore!

So be glad to finally be able to read the end of this story!!! 🎉 I'm going to write as much as I could to bring this to you as quick as possible!

Take care of you, your family, stay safe

Love you all ❤️ thanks for your patience!