(November 26th, 2030)
From : Cassidy Valentines
Subject : Divorce, Filed.
To : Jeremy Carvalho
Good day to you, Jeremy.
I have received the file with our papers from your lawyer, thank you for signing them. I will be sending them to the court through my lawyer and will let you know when you have to be there. I hope you are as satisfied with your decision as I am.
Cassidy,
Publishing consultant, therapist.
Sometimes, I wish I could trust people the same way I trust the floor in the morning. When we get off bed, we don't check if it's there. We just know it is, we trust it to be there, we just get off.
I wish I could trust my future like that, I wish I've learned to trust Jeremy like that. But now, I know that that's not what I wanted at all and I'm glad that I didn't. He wasn't a worthy man of anything, he wasn't worth of my trust like my morning floor
Have you ever had those days where you would just wake up and know that your day was bound to be bad? That you will be feeling down no matter what someone does to cheer you up? This was one of those days.
Everything seemed perfectly fine and yet my stomach was dropping, it felt like I was sinking. I felt like a five year old child whose candy had just been taken away. Like an eleven year old who's scared to go up on a Ferris wheel, like a fourteen year old who broke up with her first boyfriend and like a sixteen year old finding out that she was pregnant and her future is taken away.
I wasn't exactly sure what made me feel this way, because a) I do not eat candy, b) I like ferris wheels, c) I am already divorced, and have two kids. The feeling at the pit of my stomach had no reason, it was unexplained.
Deciding to keep an extra eye on the kids today, I skipped my shift. The kids found it weird and disturbing, but I shrugged their suspicions off.
Currently, Lisa was playing with her dolls that I got her for her fifth birthday and I was thankful for the fact that she wasn't like any other kid, she wasn't the type of kid a mother would always complain about.
Dave was trying to win a game on his Palm5 that Jeremy got him right after we separated, purposely to piss me off, I am guessing. He insisted that Dave must own one and despite of me disapprovingly groaning about it, it's not like the boys gave me a say in it anyway. And so I let it go for this once.
However, I allowed the little minion to have his way with the game only on Saturday's which also happened to be today.
It bothered me how casual Jeremy was with the kids these days and I tried to be the sensible one here in the family. It would upset me how my own kids would call me boring and another term they've always loved to use on me was a 'party pooper'. It was nice to know what I was like in their eyes, and also it was interesting to think about where they come up with such words and whatever it is that they teach them in school?
Mostly, it was Lisa who complained :
Lisa : Mom, why are you always like that? I hate it!
Me : I am not, like that. Whatever it is that you mean, dear child. It is just what you find in me. You're a kid now, you won't understand.
Lisa : Why can't you be as cool as dad? When is he coming back anyway?
Me : Why do you ask so many questions? Don't you have homework to do?
YOU ARE READING
Divorce
ChickLit"I saw that little electricity in them that the camera gave out. She was darkness, she did not become darkness and she did not embrace darkness. She is darkness. She was always darkness and I fell in love with her, I fell in love with her darkness."
