Author's Note: Da Sequel

614 7 6

by LadyMichaelishive

by LadyMichaelishive

me in like 2017: ill be back soon

me 138282 billion years later : ok so maybe I am a liar

Lol but in all seriousness, sorry its taken me so long ahahahahahahhaha but there have been a lot of life updates for me since I've started this.

For one, i started this story at the end of middle school/beginning of freshman year of high school. Fortunately......I am no longer in such a hellish institution (aka I graduated lol)

That also means I am a full 19 years old now (since November). I was 14 when I started this.

Also, I'm not in college at the moment, but I am employed now in my first job! Its very tiring and physical but it pays well ig.

Let's get to the root of this whole thing tho. This isn't the only story I've been neglecting, but im not going to bore u with the sad details of my life SO.

To make a long fuckin story short: I fell into a deep depression around the last 2 years of high school and completely lost all motivation to write. I haven't written anything in over a year (since Feb 2019), and it makes me really fucking sad because I go back and see all these stories that I've written and I....remember (???) the joy I used to have writing these things.

Like...I used to be a fuckin powerhouse and just churn out chapter after chapter here and short after short on AO3 but I had some wack shit happen to me around 2018-2020 and it just. Sucked the fucking life out of me. And I fucking hate it because I can feel how much love I poured into all my stories when I reread them, but I can barely work the energy to type this thing out, so how could I possibly muster up the force to try and write a whole new chapter/short???

It breaks my heart every time I think about it. I used to be so grounded into my craft, but then I lost my grip and I dont know how to get back to it. The feeling eats away at me, especially when I see ppl ask for updates. All I really do now is just wake up, go to work, come back home, shower, and sleep as much as I can.

Idk if it's just bc I'm getting broken into this whole 'adulting' thing or the pandemic or whatever, but life has just gotten so monotonous for me. I do have the urge to try and write again, but then I get so discouraged that I just completely give up and dig myself into a hole again.

Wow that was fuxkin sad af lmaooooo. So sorry to be a bummer here but im tired of making excuses and making promises I can't fulfill so I just thought I'd come out and say this.

If, for some reason, you do still want to keep close, my AO3 is sebastian_michaelishive. I'm trying to hone my craft again in small threads on Twitter @synsin_aftrdark (full disclosure: I am a proshipper and its an 18+ acc so please, no minors!).

Again, sorry to dump this on yall, but some comments got to me and I feel like yall deserve to know what's going on.

As for this fic itself....probably gonna put it on hiatus. Don't want to discontinue it just yet bc I feel like it has potential, but I need to work on my motivation first before attempting this again.

I hope you all understand! Be safe, wear your masks, and be kind.

With love,

Anne