Repeat After Me

Chapter 68

When I got upstairs, I discovered Asten had already rung. He'd left a hurried, whispered voicemail message. 'Ivy, it's me. I've just told her I can't be with her anymore. I've told her I have to be with you. I've done it. I've finally done it. I'm coming over. I have to see you. These stage 4 restrictions are harsh. I have to see you before 6pm. I'm ordering an Uber. Text me your address.'

It had just turned 4pm. In two hours the 5 kilometre restrictions would be in place. I sent him my address and I waited, excitement growing within me.

Finally we could be a real couple. He could ring my doorbell and I could introduce him to my mum. I could say 'this is my boyfriend.' I could show him my room. I could show him my drawings. I could show him my feelings. We could sneak sweet kisses behind my closed door. I could run my fingertips up his forearms. Rest a kiss in the diary of his neck. Broadcast my devotion in the public address system of his ear.

Finally he'd told Alicia. It was sad for her, but she was no good for him. She was destroying him. She was misfiring his confidence, paint stripping his future, intruding on his privacy, concealing his potential, restricting his movements. I could help rebuild his confidence. I loved him for exactly who he was.

5pm came and went. I couldn't draw or read a book. I watched TikTok, impatiently skipping through vids, and scrolled through Instagram. 5.30pm stopped at the station and shot off again without waiting for passengers. 6pm the 5km restrictions kicked in. I didn't know what that meant for us. If we're a couple are we allowed to see each other? Are we a couple? Now I was getting confused. He should've been here. I listened to his voicemail again. He definitely said 'I have to see you before 6pm.' Soon mum would call me down for dinner. 8pm the curfew begins. If he's found on the streets the police will fine him. He has to be here by 8pm.

Mum called us down for dinner. Meatball pasta. An old favourite. But we ate with gloom settling on our shoulders, our world had just been downsized.

'Should we watch a movie after dinner?' mum asked. 'I've heard Umbrella Academy is good.'

Josh and I both shrugged our shoulders.

'We should spend more time together,' mum said. 'As a family.'

'Three quarters of a family,' Josh corrected her.

'Well, yeah,' mum said. 'It's important we do things together. That you're not in your rooms all the time. That we all stay connected.'

'Okay, okay,' Josh said.

'Ivy, you all right, darling?' mum asked. 'You seem quiet. Are you upset about remote learning again? You okay? I know six weeks seems like a long time, but it'll go quickly again.'

I manufactured a smile. 'Of course,' I said. 'I'm fine about it.' What I wasn't fine about was Asten not being here when he said he would be. Here I was ready to introduce him to my family and he hadn't turned up. Frustration scuttled around my mind, leaving dirty footprints.

Finally dinner was over and I could retreat to my room. I checked my phone. No message, 7.15pm. It doesn't take three hours to get here. It doesn't take three hours to send a ten second message. Damn him. I couldn't figure it out. Here I was ready to announce us to the world, (which was a very big deal, I'd never introduced a boy to my family before), and where was he? Where was he?

8pm. The curfew descended on Melbourne. Everyone had to be home, under their roof, by the heater, passing their time in strict lockdown. He wasn't coming. We were not a thing. I needed to stop imagining.

Mum called out from downstairs. 'Who wants to watch something?'

'I'm on the xbox with Darcy,' Josh yelled down.

I opened the door and stood at the top of the staircase. 'I'd love to mum,' I called out. 'But I have a headache. I think I'll just go to bed. Can we watch it tomorrow night?'

Mum smiled up at me gratefully. I could see she needed company too. She was missing her loved one. Dad. 'Of course,' she said.

'I'm sorry,' I said.

'Drink lots of water,' she said. 'You're probably forgetting to drink water. I'll bring you up some.'

I brushed my teeth and changed into my pyjamas. As I was lying down in bed, mum bought me in a glass of water. As she said goodnight at the doorway, my phone beeped. I was desperate to see the message, but mum was taking a long time with her pep talk. 'It will all be okay,' she was saying. 'You know how to do the remote learning now. You're used to it. You'll just have to step back into that mode. And the teachers will be better at it this time too. They'll know what to expect. All the technology is set up to make it work better. We're lucky, in a way. The government is trying to protect us. We don't want to end up as one of those other countries where everything is out of control.'

'I'll be fine,' I said. 'Thanks mum. I just need to sleep.'

'Okay darling,' mum said. 'I'm so proud of the way you and Josh are handling all this. You've had to face a lot more than I ever did as a teenager.'

Poor mum. She really needed another adult to talk to. 'Have you spoken to dad?' I asked.

'Yeah. He's in shock about the lockdown. I mean, to think he's in Queensland and there's an actual crowd of thousands of people at the football and we are here with an 8pm curfew and a 5 kilometre radius, it seems unfair.'

I pursed my lips together. 'When will he be back?'

'Not till the end of the season. It sounds terrible, but part of me hopes Geelong don't even make the finals.'

'Where are they on the ladder?' I asked.

'Third I think.'

'Goddamn,' I said. 'Hope they go on a losing streak.' Finally mum smiled. 'You must be really missing him.'

'I am. What about you?'

'Yeah, I miss him too, it doesn't feel the same without him. But I know he'll be back, it's just temporary. And he's doing it for all of us. He doesn't really want to be away from us.'

'Okay darling, sweet dreams.'

'I love you so much, mum.'

'I love you too.'

Finally she turned out my light and I was able to check my phone. It said, 'call me when you have a minute.'