There was no time wasted before the gap between us was closed. As soon as her lips touched mine, I was in pure ecstasy and I knew that at the moment we realized that the only drug we needed was each other. She kissed me gently but urgently. She was drunk and I was sober but at that very moment, I felt as drunk as she was. The feeling could only be explained as euphoric. The rush that flowed through my veins was there again. The same rush that always happened whenever she was around. She gently bit my bottom lip and I had to refrain from letting out a moan. She lifted her hand and rested it on the side of my neck, slowly applying pressure and kissing me harder. I felt her tongue glide slightly across my bottom lip and gladly opened my mouth allowing her tongue to slide in. Our tongues met and danced together and my heart fluttered. Without breaking the kiss, she gently pushed me back, her hand still rested on the side of my neck and I allowed myself to fall gracefully onto the bed with her above me, straddling me. She removed her hand from my neck and used her finger to gently trace down towards my chest. I felt the goosebumps litter my body and between my legs start to throb. Her lips started kissing down my neck and I felt her more often than not, suck my skin then lick it gently afterwards. Demi placed her thigh between my legs and added slight pressure onto my center causing me to let out a heated moan.
"You like that?" She mumbled against my lips.
I didn't say anything. I grabbed the back of her neck and pulled her even closer to me, causing our lips to crash together so hard I could taste blood. Her hands caressed my body and she slowly dragged them down to my stomach. I felt her cold hands reach up under neath my shirt and cup my breasts.
"Woah, girl. Cool it down." I panted.
"Are you getting hot?" She rasped.
I bit my lip and nodded.
"But you're not ready?"
"No. Sorry."
She threw herself off me and laid next to me. "What does this mean for us?"
"I don't know, Dems."
"When you know, let me know."
She turned to her side and wrapped her arms around me. I relaxed and snuggled into her as much as I could. I didn't know what had just happened but I did know that I could definitely get used to it.
I inhaled her scent. Alcohol, sex and cigarettes. It wasn't the best smell, but it was HER smell. And I loved it.
I smiled to myself and fell asleep that night, happy. Nothing but happy.
~
I woke up the next morning to an empty bed. A feeling of loneliness overwhelmed me, but only for a second before the events of last night started swirling around in my head. A smile plastered itself on my face as I thought of what Demi said.
'I'm in love with you. Yeah, its that bad.' Why was it bad?
'I don't wanna be with anybody else. I don't. I really don't. I don't think about anyone anymore. I think about you.' Why was I finding it so hard to believe her?
'I don't want to even touch anyone who isn't you.' Than why did she smell like sex last night?
That's why I didn't believe her. She came home drunk and smelling like sex. I gave into her. God, I hated myself. I let her come into bed with me and kiss me after she had been out fucking some piece of shit.
I was pulled out of my thoughts by her walking out of the bathroom.
"Morning." She said plainly.
Oh, now she was acting like nothing even happened? Does she even remember it?
"We need to talk." I stated sternly.
"Do we?"
"Sex." Was all I said.
"You want to have sex?" She smirked at me.
I scoffed. "No. You came back last night smelling like sex."
"And your point is what exactly?"
I stood up, now frustrated with the obnoxious girl standing in front of me. "My point is that you came home after fucking some desperate asshole, got into bed with me, made out with me and even tried to fuck me!" I was yelling by this point.
"Cool."
"That's all you have to fucking say? 'Cool'? Great, Demetria, fucking great." I threw my hands up in surrender. "I can't do this with you anymore."
"Do what?" Her facial expression was blank.
I started to make my way towards the door. "Us." I managed to choke out in a whisper. I turned the door handle and opened the door.
"Wait!"
I turned around to face her.
She used her hands to cup my cheeks and I felt myself melt into her touch as I always did.
"I'm sorry." She breathed. "I am so sorry. I shouldn't have done what I did. I knew what I was doing was wrong. I shouldn't have slept with her." Her face softened.
"Than why did you?" My voice broke.
She let out a heavy sigh. "I was so drunk. I have issues Selena, a lot of them. We were just dancing and I couldn't help myself." But I stopped. I swear, I stopped Sel."
"Why?"
"Because she wasn't you."
"Why do you think you have so many issues, Dems? Why do you think you're so fucked up?"
"The darkness. It has me." She almost started panicking.
I wrapped my arms around her. "No, Dee. I have you."
"The depression. The anxiety. It eats at me. Its threatening to swallow me whole, Sel. Its going to get me." She sobbed, shaking.
"What's it like? Anxiety. I know depression. Depression had me. But what's anxiety like? I want to know how you feel." I asked, going off the topic of her killing herself. She didn't have to say those words for me to realize that's exactly what she was talking about. The idea of her even leaving me was unbearable.
"You don't want to know."
"I do, Dee. I want to know."
"I can't decide whether I like Dems or Dee more." She smiled.
"Tell me. What is it like?"
