Bad Enough for You (Currently Editing)

In the Future, We'll All be Gay

So, I know I had said in the last chapter that there would be a lot of updates this past week. Unfortunately, life got in the way and I worked every single day since I've gotten home -.- It sucks and I apologize, but here's an extra long chapter to make up for it!

14.] In the Future, We'll All be Gay 

I had stopped wondering when it was that Georgia had decided that it was better to be bad and started wondering when I would fully embrace this new lifestyle of mine. So, I had only been to one measly party, but all I wanted was to do it again. I wanted to get wept away in a cloud of smoke, the taste of alcohol, and forget about all of the people in my life that were trying to control it.

The last bit was probably the reason why I had locked my bedroom door when I stormed into it after having argued with Blaine. Blaine, of course, had followed me up the stairs and was pacing outside my door. He kept calling my name, occasionally knocking on the door and trying to convince me to come out. While part of me knew that the argument we just had was stupid, but I didn’t like the idea that he was perfectly okay with people mapping out his life. Didn’t he want to make his own decisions?

It was around this time that I realized that Blaine was the safe choice. I didn’t exactly have a lot of options at the moment, but I did know that being with Blaine would probably entail a lifetime of comfort and security. There would never be any fear of failing, no thrill of the fall when times were desperate.

Of course, I didn’t want to be poor. I knew that my own lifestyle was far too extravagant for a cashier’s budget and knock-offs were an immediate turn-off in my mind. I couldn’t imagine sneaking into back rooms to buy cheap handbags that claimed to be the real thing. While I could spot a knock-off Coach from across an ocean, I figured that if I was to do it on my own, then I’d probably be carrying one of those knock-offs.

There was someone in my life, though, who knew exactly what it was like to have to do it on their own. It took a moment for me to come to conclusion that talking to Angeline was what I needed to do. She had had three years worth of experience of making it on her own. Though, I suspected that Oliver was doing a lot for her so that she wasn’t entirely dependent on herself, but Angeline was tough as nails.

She was a bit scary, but I figured that it was because she had to be in order to survive in a world full of rich kids forever dependent on their daddy’s paycheck. While she had a lifetime of worries piled on her back and a criminal record that would probably haunt her forever, she had to pretend like she gave a shit. Even with her new undercut that just made her even more badass, there had to be something more.

It was probably the something more that Oliver could see. I couldn’t see him sticking it out through thick and thin for someone who didn’t treat him the right way. Certainly, Angeline didn’t, but I couldn’t help but wonder if there was some sort of thrill in not always being treated the right way.

Blaine had always treated me like a princess and for the longest time, I was content with that. Now, though, I was beginning to become bored with being Cinderella. While it was nice to be treated like that all of the time, it was admittedly boring. There was never any surprise, never any excitement to what may happen next. Our relationship had just become routine. Routines were something people adjusted to because it was comfortable, it was the easiest way to get through something.

I didn’t like routine. I liked the idea of every moment being the next step towards the edge of the cliff. Then, I wanted it to be like falling. The fall of every relationship is always the most thrilling, the moment in which everything seems to feel like pure bliss.

Of course, not every moment could be exciting, but I wanted the feeling that any moment could hold at least an ounce of excitement.

Pushing through the revolving door, I shook my hair out of my eyes. I came to a stop only a few steps into the room, my eyes landing on a very attractive guy standing at the front desk. He was leaning against it, head ducked as he looked at the phone in his hand.