Rivals?

Chapter 2

Abby, Haylee, and I have put on make-up and we decided to match outfits today. We are all wearing our white Crocs, jeans, and a light brown sweater. It's early November and it's starting to get cold outside so we are wearing Nike socks with the Crocs. We planned this last night so everyone was prepared. We all have mascara and tinted sunscreen on with clear lipgloss. We did a French braid train so now we all have two friend braids over our shoulders. 

"Yeah. We're hot." Abby giggles to herself. She then pulls up Snapchat on her iPhone and snaps a photo of us three to post on her private story. 

"Hell yeah," Haylee says as she fixes her lipgloss in my mirror. I don't say anything. I grab my bag and throw lip gloss, my wallet, phone, and house key in there. 

We head to Abby's little white Toyota 4Runner and we hop in, drive away, and head for the mall. Abby was talking about her boyfriend, Paul, the entire way there. "He's so sweet," "He brought me chips yesterday when he found out I was on my period," blah, blah, blah. It's bad enough that he cheated but what's even worse is that she was so gullible to believe he'd change and got back together with him. Haylee and I are single and plan to stay that way. We both agree to just want to enjoy high school and college without something holding us down. Abby claims that having a boyfriend is great because love is something you want to experience before you are let free into the real world. Haylee and I, however, don't fall into that trap.

We pull into the mall parking lot and park in the back. Here, in Bristol Tennesee, you have to be aware of the people. It's shady. When we got out of the car, we chatted as we walked to the mall doors. We go into all the stores, talking shit about people we don't like and also talking about how much we dream about guys at our school (except Abby, of course). 

After blowing our money on cute sweaters and sweatshirts, UGG boots, and jewelry, we head to the food court, get some food, and sit down. 

"Guys, can I ask you something?" Abby asks as she finishes chewing a cheese-covered fry. Haylee and I look at each other and nod at Abby. "Are you afraid of sex?" 

Haylee almost choked and I giggled to myself. "Of course I am," I say and take another bite of my hotdog. 

"No, not really. I'm not.. afraid... I just don't wanna have it." Haylee looks down at her food. 

"I mean... Paul has been talking about it but told me I don't have to commit to it if I don't want to. He acts like he really wants it though," she takes another fry and eats it slowly, looking like she is thinking, and then says, "I've been thinking about it... and I really wanna lose my v-card to him." She talks in a hushed voice because we are in public.

"Shit, Abby, he cheated on you," I say, looking right into her hurt eyes. I don't feel bad for what I said. I'm just trying to protect her dumbass. I mean, sex? At sixteen? Haylee sits there and doesn't say a word when I glance at her.

"Wow, Kayla, I thought you'd be a little supportive. Just because you don't wanna have a real relationship with someone doesn't mean I can't." She says quietly still, not trying to draw attention to ourselves. I can tell she's pissed. Her cheeks are bright red and she doesn't even look me in the eye.

"Come on, Abby. That's not what I am saying and you know it. He cheated on you. Remember? He's not committed, babe." I say, trying to meet eyes with her but she just stares off in the distance. 

"Whatever, Mikayla Shapiro. The Shapiro family is just so perfect, isn't it? You know, not letting their daughter have a real boyfriend, forcing her to make a 4.0 every year, throwing books at her and putting stupid thoughts in her mind, gaslighting her into thinking she doesn't need romantic love in life? Am I not correct, Haylee?" Abby looks at her and finally looks into my eyes. I can tell she's not as mad as she was before. She's cooled off after saying everything she did. Her cheeks are back to normal. Except, her eyes, which look hurt after she sees my eyes water. I don't let a teardrop come out, though.

"Guys," Haylee starts and thinks about what she's about to say and then finally spits out, "I think we should calm down and leave. We had a good time. Maybe we just need to cool off in the car?" 

"Sure. Let's go." I say, sniffing loudly and standing up and walking towards the trash can. I can hear Abby and Haylee talking back at the table but it's muffled with all the other talking in the mall. I didn't realize how loud it was until now. I was drowning in my own thoughts when Abby brought up my family. Not all of it's right, but most of it is. My dad is never home because he owns a car shop and is always behind. He's cheated on my mom multiple times and left us, but my mom can't risk leaving him. She had me and my brother at eighteen and it was all so much for her to handle. She didn't go to college until thirty. She is now a nurse and works three times a week. Night shift too. They are so over-protective but don't even care about my mental health. I just recently told my mom about my self-harm. Abby and Haylee don't know because I do it on my stomach and back and I don't change in front of them. They've asked me why and I've always changed the subject or ignored the question. They don't really care anyway. My mom, however, talked to me all day when I told her and acted like she cared. I even made her cry. Although, we haven't talked about it since. She made me promise I would never do it again. I said I promised but I lied. If she checked up on me and cared, maybe I would've stopped. She said I might need medical help but she said it'll be on my record and colleges might be skeptical of me seeing a therapist. They aren't all unicorns and rainbows with my brother either.

"Come on, Mickey," Haylee says, pulling on my arm. I didn't realize I was just standing there with my tray still in my hand. I dump my leftovers in the trash and place the tray on top of the trashcan. I hear Abby walking in front of Haylee and I mumbling something loudly. It had to be intentional because I heard every word she said. 

"What a daddy-issued fucker." 

I tried to ignore what she said as we walked to her car. She had hurt in her eyes when she almost saw me cry. I know it. She's just mad right now. Over a stupid talk of sex. I mean, sex is such a waste of something to talk about. Everyone seems to want it. I don't. It's scary and it's a toy to hang over girl's and boy's heads. People act like it's the best thing in the world but don't want to talk about the consequences of it. Pregnancy, guilt, trust issues, realization the person you committed to is a piece of shit. Abby just doesn't want to listen to that. She only sees the good part. Love. However, I don't think she realizes she doesn't have that with Paul. Or, she's too scared to leave him. Either way, none of it's real. He's using her for her looks and apparently trying to shoot for sex just so he can run off with someone else after.

We get in the car and buckle up but Abby doesn't start the car right away. Instead, she whispers something in Haylee's ear in the passenger seat. Haylee looks at her with a pitiful look and turns around to look at me in the middle backseat. Abby starts the car and starts to pull off.

Haylee sighs and looks at me with an annoyed look now and says, "She needs a break. From both of us." 

I roll my eyes. 

I don't mind. I'm just a daddy-issued fucker. Right?