Finally, I Found You

Chapter Seven: Emil

This chapter is written from Cherryl's point of view.

This chapter is coming from my own experiences on how the relationship with my former boyfriend of a year and five months ended. Though fictional, I will try my best way to explain it in a manner that would respect each side.

We may not find each other the closure that we both needed because it was a messy break-up, but I hope all the stories that I made about my ex-boyfriend, Emil, will close their chapters now. I'll no longer continue Your Polish Stalker and all the stories that were inspired by our relationship to heal completely and have the closure that I needed. 

Other than that, I hope this chapter gives justice to my inactivity!

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"I don't know..." I talked to Magdalena the other night. She was very patient in listening to me, even if it took us an hour to finally blurt out what I wanted to say. It felt like I was telling her the whole story. It would have taken my whole life to explain to her what happened between Emil and me on the fourth year that Ethan was away from my embrace.

"Emil was an idiot to forcefully love you at that time," she said. "You could have stayed away from him completely."

"I..." I sobbed. "I loved him like how I love Ethan."

Magdalena paused, receiving a message from Emil that he was already at the hotel. "He asked you to come to his hotel room to talk to him for one last time. That must not be real when he told me this!" Magdalena jumped, fearing that Emil would come anytime soon. "Emil was an idiot. He wanted to force you to love him as he was unlovable in the past. He would eventually get mad when you got stolen away from him."

"I know I made a huge mistake, and I remember Emil was upset I was hanging out much with Ethan before I knew that I was very incompetent and unsure about my feelings with him, which led us to break up..."

"Explain more, kochana!" Magdalena was more than interested in listening to me at that time.

"Okay," I took a deep breath. "Five years ago, Emil and I decided to part ways. We both knew that we weren't meant for each other, but it still hurt. During that time, I was feeling lost and alone. I wasn't sure what I wanted in life, let alone in a partner. And then I met Ethan. He was different from anyone I had ever met before. He was kind, and caring, and always knew how to make me laugh, though there were traces of him dating and bringing girls from the restaurant we went to that night. We started spending more time together, and I found myself falling for him. It was scary but also exciting. I had never felt this way before. I tried to fight it at first, but eventually, I gave in. I know what I did hurt Emil, and I'm sorry for that. But I hope he can understand that I was just trying to find my way in life and my heart led me to Ethan."

I looked down at my own hands, my voice softening. "It wasn't an easy decision to make. Emil and I had been together for a long time, and I cared about him deeply. But I couldn't ignore the feelings I had for Ethan. I remember feeling so confused and torn at the time. I didn't know what to do. But eventually, I realized that I had to be true to myself and my feelings. I know Emil was hurt by what happened, and I'm sorry for that. But I hope he can understand that I wasn't trying to hurt him intentionally. I was just trying to find my way in life and figure out what I wanted."

Magdalena listened intently to my story, nodding in understanding. "It sounds like you were in a tough spot," she said sympathetically. "It's never easy when our hearts are torn between two people we care about. But I think you made the right choice by following your heart. You can't help who you fall in love with, and you shouldn't have to apologize for that. It's natural to feel scared and uncertain when you're in a new relationship, but it's also exciting. I'm sure Emil will eventually come around and understand that you weren't trying to hurt him. You were just trying to find your own happiness."